It’s time we talked about Casino: The best, worst and only real nightclub in Guildford

It’s the ultimate great British night

It’ll be hard to pinpoint when you first heard about the Onslow Street institution that is Casino.

It may have been whispers in the George Abbot playground passed down from older, wiser sixth formers, it may have been muttered under your parents’ breath as they vigorously shook their heads at the latest antics of Michel Harper in the Surrey Ad. But one thing’s for sure: you knew about it way before you were old enough to go there.

You saw it as you left The Friary to go the cinema, flaming torches lighting up the most depressing clubbing roundabout in the world. You heard its name mentioned on Eagle radio alongside Cheryl Coles’, so you thought it was the fanciest place around.

Fast forward five years. You’re 18, it’s finally happened. Sure, it’s no longer called Harpers and yeah, it is a Monday in November, but the golden doors have finally opened for you and there’s no way you’re going to miss it. It’s a standard MNG: Pres at whoever’s mum is out, then either a mate’s car or taxi to ‘spoons. Meet everyone you saw four hours earlier in the common room. See off some double vodka Monsters (why always Monster?) and then off to Casino for before midnight.