St Mary’s: The Newcastle accommodation you’ve never heard of

There’s only two buses an hour


Unless you live in Leazes or Ricky you may as well be at Northumbria.

People look confused when I tell them I’m from St Mary’s, like it’s some strange foreign land they’ve never heard of.

Here’s what it’s like to be from the mystery halls:

People think that you’re a Rah when they hear the words ‘St Mary’s’

Despite how much you point out you pay £2 a week more than Ricky Road and there isn’t a single en suite to be found in the whole accommodation. It’s not private accommodation either, and no it wasn’t our first choice. Ultimately though it does look pretty swanky from the outside.

You will frequently receive comments such as ‘never heard of it’ and ‘where’s that?’- possibly what non-mary’s are thinking as they read this.

The answer is Fenham, not that that helps locate us. It’s 40 minutes of fast paced walking to get into uni which is why we aren’t sympathetic to Ricky Roaders who turn up late to seminars we got up an hour ago to get to.

But there is a metro right?

If only this were true. Unlike Bowsdon Court, the other university accommodation equally as far out, we don’t have the luxury of a metro. 2 buses an hour run from monument back to where we live but never run on time.

However there is a free bus between 8 and 10 weekday mornings. Wanna be in for 9 am lecture? Risk the 8.30 being full or setting off before you get on or be cautious and get the 8 am?

You WILL find your flatmates at the end of a night out

No wandering back on your own or getting in a taxi with course mates to your accommodation. No one will be going the same way you are so you only ever leave the club in threes to ensure the taxi home doesn’t end up costing more than your night out.

You end up with the best flat mates

‘Angel’ Andrew holding the flat sick bowl! Always there to trek back to halls with you and hold your hair when you’ve had one too many

The Sinners’ trebles get the better of you and there is no way you can get in a taxi. St Mary’s flatmates stick together. Walking your flat mate all the way home in the week Newcastle was colder than Moscow might not be a highlight of your friendship, (shout out to my Flat mate Andrew who has now done this twice for me), but it’s those times that make you grateful you ended up in Mary’s and met the best people.

We get free parking

One of the few perks of being in the middle of nowhere is free parking. Hope you make friends with the person in the flat below who brought up their car after realising first semester would have been easier had they brought it up in the first place and enjoy group trips to Morrison’s.

You know the importance of location when choosing your second year house

Mary’s residents realise that next year we don’t want a long walk back from uni or to wait half an hour for a stage coach bus. We are savy when choosing our accommodation for next year and the Right Move section that tells you how close a property is to the reliable West Jes and Jesmond metros is the first thing we looked at when making house viewings.