I’d rather be at any other Uni than Cambridge


Cambridge is shit. Let's stop kidding ourselves

After studying at Cambridge for nearly two years I’ve come to a startling realisation.

I think it’s really shit here. Like, really shit.

I mean, it has its moments. May Week was spectacular and I’ve definitely had many experiences I don’t think I’d have been able to have at any other university, but the negatives far outweigh the positives.

Let’s start with the fact I can just about bear the company of around 20 people in the entirety of my college. Of those, I’d be happy to call roughly 5 my friends. And it’s not like I’m unsociable or unpopular. It’s just I find most of the people here either repulsive or boring.

Most people have no substance to them – they’re happy with the monotony of having a preplanned week – rowing, Cindies and chatting absolute bollocks. There’s no spontaneity.

I’m finding myself frequenting the pubs on Mill Road to get away from the kinds of dickheads who think drinking societies are cool. The whole university consists of the type of people who would have been bullied at my high school for being arrogant, nerdy pricks.

Idiots, the lot of them

Idiots, the lot of them

I’m finding myself more and more inclined to go home to acclimatise myself with normal people and it frustrates me constantly that people don’t wake up and realise how obnoxious they’ve become. I don’t want to talk about politics or blues or University Challenge, I don’t care about how difficult your subject is and how you’ve got no free time, just fuck off.

Speaking of Cindies, dear God the nightlife here is absolutely dire. The jokes about Cindies playing songs for 30 seconds have been done to death, but I’d rather kill myself than listen to “Circle of Life” again.

I see pictures of club nights from back home – £1 drinks, 1p entry, rodeo bulls, free shots and wonder why I have to be stuck with four terrible clubs which play nearly identical music week in, week out: overcrowded, overpriced and over-sweaty.

Has Cambridge enriched my personality? Nope, I’m more cynical than ever. The university has destroyed my self-worth. It has the horrible habit of taking the best and brightest of the country and stripping away everything that they cherished as being valuable about their personality.

I don't think he noticed me take this photo

I don’t think he noticed me take this photo

I’ve gone from being “Gifted and Talented” to a number, exactly the same as everyone else and completely average. Seeing friends at other unis easily getting 2:1s and firsts and struggling to maintain a 2:2 is the most disheartening thing to happen to me.

Am I getting my money’s worth? Hell, no. I’m paying £9000 a year to go to a handful of lectures and do a bunch of independent study. Of those lectures, only 1 or 2 actually benefit me in any way towards my exams. I’ve had to have Skype supervisions because my supervisors don’t have enough time for me.

I’ve not been prepared for my future. I don’t have a clue what I’m going to be doing with my life. The only thing which matters is I get my predicted grade, ANOTHER thing I’m struggling to do at the moment.

Honestly, the list just goes on and on, but I’ll stop there because I’ve nearly finished my application to transfer to Manchester.

@TheTab
Get the best of The Tab on our app.

,        

SHIT SUBJECT: The Arts

VOTE NOW: We didn’t include Land Economy, just to make things a bit more interesting

Caesarian Sunday: The Playlist

Get pumped (hopefully not your stomach) with these tunes.

Tab guide to etiquette: Afternoon tea

How to make it seem like you have tea more than Her Majesty, the Queen.

, Chief Reporter

Remembering American Adventure, the closest we got to the USA in the Midlands

Horses, guns and rollercoasters. What more could you want?

, Head of Marketing

I’d rather hang out with my parents than go clubbing

Most of my friends would, too

, Durham Editor of The Tab

Rhodes Must Fall founder makes waitress cry ‘typical white tears’

He wrote ‘WE WILL GIVE TIP WHEN YOU RETURN THE LAND’

,        

How to check your boobs: A guide

It’s so easy

Aussie street style: Melbourne

Could you be any more laidback