Union sinks to new lows?

After the disaster of the Union’s Atlantis-themed ball last year, which fittingly sank without trace, it seems surprising that the Union returns for another nautical-themed extravaganza.

However with a poster proudly displaying a still from the 1997 multi-Oscar winning movie, tonight’s Union ball will be a celebration of the deaths of more than 1500 men women and children “a night on the Titanic – an evening of glamour and decadence”

Riveting entertainment or the Union plumbing new depths of poor taste?

Guests are promised champagne and oysters and string quartet, as would have been enjoyed by the 325 first class passengers, 48% of who perished in seas of 28 degrees Fahrenheit.

Shall we go to the chocolate fountain or get a burrito?

And while originally a first class ticket would have set you back £870, the sold out ball looks much more reasonable at just £49 for members or £55 for guests.

This looks like a good idea for a party

Maritime disaster balls are few and far between, Wolfson College Cambridge hosting one in 2011 and Oriel’s Titanic Commemoration Ball of 2012 perhaps being the most unfortunately named.

Come children, pretend you’re about to drown!

Connoisseurs of mass drowning-themed celebrations will be saddened to learn that the closest tonight’s ball goers will get to 1,000 tons of steel piercing ice is the vodka luge .

Still, with unlimited free drinks proving plentiful opportunities to drown your sorrows this author says:

“God Bless This Ball and All Who Sail In Her!”