All the things that should happen now that I’m a Celeb is being filmed in Wales
if they don’t arrive on Dave’s Coaches I cba
By now, it’s pretty much common knowledge that this year’s I’m a Celeb is being filmed in cold and breezy North Wales instead of the tropical paradise that is the Australian jungle. They’ve swapped snakes and spiders for sheep shit, and we’re all pretty excited for it here. If you’re gonna film it in Wales, you’ve got to do it properly, so here’s all the things that should happen now I’m a Celeb is being filmed here….
The camp mates should arrive by Dave’s Coaches obviously
Seriously, how else are they gonna get there? By sheep? Daffodil hopping? Certainly not by bloody Chariots that’s for sure. Usually, we see the campmates enter by helicopter, but come on, we’re not extravagant like that here in Wales. Ring up Dave Coaches and ask him for a ride, chuck him a celebration or two and you’re away sugar tits.
‘I’m bloody tamping fuming raging get me out of here!’
We’re in Wales now, alright butt. The ordinary ‘I’m a Celebrity get me out of here’ chant will just not suffice. This year’s campmates should be opting for a more traditional Welsh phrase, and what better than ‘I’m bloody tamping fuming raging get me out of here”.
Forget rice and beans, cockles and laverbread all round
For as long as we can remember, the I’m a Celeb campmates have eaten rice and beans as their staple diet. It seems only fitting that the Welsh version should be cockles and laverbread.
Bye Kiosk Keith, hello Nessa’s arcade booth
Don’t pretend like you don’t know what I’m on about. You know, that classic Gavin and Stacey scene where Ness sits in her little arcade booth singing Islands in the Stream with Bryn. Then she kicks off at the boys trying to steal from her penny pusher machine in extremely fast Welsh that only true Welshies would understand.
If there’s no jungle, then what’s the need for Keith. We loved him, but it’s time for a replacement, and what’s better than Ness sitting in her arcade booth. Camp mates could play her un-winnable arcade games to win the prize for an ice cream at Marco’s with Stacey. Fab. Or a Ju-Jitsu lesson with Pam and fat-no-more Pat.
The two camps should be called the Jacks and the Blues
There’s no other way to name the two camps than after the classic Welsh football rivalry between Swansea Jack’s and Cardiff Blues. It would certainly get the viewers involved a bit more than usual that’s for sure. We can settle for the Ospreys and Dragons if needs be, though.
Upon exit, you’re walking the Prince of Wales bridge mate
When the celebs get booted out, they take to the bridge to get out of the jungle. Not this time. This year’s campmates should be walking the Prince of Wales bridge in my opinion, bit more exciting init.
So there we have it, all the ways we think I’m a Celeb should Welsh-ify the series this year. P.s. this was written by a Welsh gal, so she’s not mocking Welsh culture, it’s all just a bit of fun.
Feature image credit: Instagram @antanddec