SIMON NORMAN is a bit lost, but it’s OK – being lost can sometimes mean finding yourself/a patisserie/ at least a Starbucks coffee.
Is SIMON NORMAN a man yet? Judging by his failure to find a proper job, he’s probably not.
Don’t lie about rapping. That’s the message from our resident liar SIMON NORMAN this week.
If James Blunt sung love songs in Antarctica and no one witnessed it, can we hope that he died? Yes, says SIMON NORMAN.
On his quest to answer all the big questions in his weekly column, SIMON NORMAN asks: “Is the world controlled by an invisible illuminati regime?” Spoiler: probs not.