Simon Norman
Pembroke, NatSci (Chemistry) Born feckless and nude, Simon has spent the last 20 years of his life crying for attention – both figuratively and literally. Inspired to share his thoughts with the world after a tragic incident involving two nuns and a plastic spatula, Simon aims to solve many of the philosophical, moral and ethical problems that plague the world. Simon’s greatest achievement in life was the management of the successful Barack Obama presidential campaign.

Simon Norman

This week, SIMON NORMAN’s getting all topical. He’s talking occupations and hispters.

Simon Norman

SIMON NORMAN is a bit lost, but it’s OK – being lost can sometimes mean finding yourself/a patisserie/ at least a Starbucks coffee.

Simon Norman

Is SIMON NORMAN a man yet? Judging by his failure to find a proper job, he’s probably not.

Simon Norman

Don’t lie about rapping. That’s the message from our resident liar SIMON NORMAN this week.

Simon Norman

If James Blunt sung love songs in Antarctica and no one witnessed it, can we hope that he died? Yes, says SIMON NORMAN.

Simon Norman

On his quest to answer all the big questions in his weekly column, SIMON NORMAN asks: “Is the world controlled by an invisible illuminati regime?” Spoiler: probs not.

Simon Norman

SIMON NORMAN’s mum wants to hear all about his ladyfriend and talk about sex.