I bet you (dont) look good on the dancefloor

Students love a pissed up dance. Id go as far to say more so than any other demographic of folk painting the town red. It could mean expressing literally in sign language to that funky remix of Mr Brightside or moshing to knife party, you’re there in your droves.

A busy dancefloor is a tricky one to navigate. If you’re dancing next to that person you like, you dont want to get off to get a VK incase some other social butterfly steals your partner. You’re covered in sweat and alcohol, there’s jostling for position and the whole time you’re wondering if you’re dancing like Michael Jackson or Miley Cyrus.

Some people like to throw their shapes in the middle of the dance-floor, some on the periphery. The periphery is where I saw possibly the funniest dancing accident.

The girl in question was with a group of friends who were all “slut dropping”. Her friends were fantastic at it. Ass to the grass squatters of the highest quality. The girl with the excellent squatters wasn’t so good. Shall we say that if she was writing a dating ad, she would describe herself as “bubbly”. She needed a bit more support, so rather than a free standing squat, she used a railing for support. Fantastic, she too went very deep 4 times. On the 5th… disaster.

Apparently her quads had given up, too tired to lift her hulking frame back to a standing position. She was at the bottom of the squat, holding onto the railing for support and could neither push herself with her legs, or pull herself with her arms back up. Her friends hadnt noticed and she was stuck down there for approximately 30 seconds before she let go. She performed a perfect stop, drop and roll as if she was on fire and jumped back to her feet. Truly one of the funniest things ive ever seen.

William W Purkey was quoted to say “you’ve gotta dance like theres nobody watching”, I’d ignore that. Ha!

Stay safe out there!