Your favourite Agony Uncle is back to solve MORE of your problems…

There’s this boy I keep seeing in the library and I really fancy him. We’ve made eye contact a few times but I’m too scared to go over and introduce myself; I’ll never forgive myself if I don’t take the chance though.

You’ve done the right thing so far. This isn’t the U.S of A, you can’t just waltz over and strike up a conversation, especially in the sacred place of work that is the library. I suggest you either follow closely behind him as he takes books out or continually walk past his place of work attempting to ascertain his name from his student card or other personal belongings – at worst he’ll suspect a weak bladder. Following this, spend two to three weeks Facebook stalking before adding him having returned from another lonely night out. Once this has been achieved it’s safe to say that you “know” him and it is then possible to talk to him once in the “safe zone” of 4-12 units of alcohol.


I’m in third year now and my work load has become pretty heavy. My friends keep going out but I always feel I should stay in to work. My friends have suggested that I’ve become boring; I don’t want to be that guy.

It certainly gets more difficult to balance work and play as you move on through your university career. On one hand it’s your last year of fun until you retire and if you spend all your time in the library you’ll surely never meet that special someone or graduate with any friends, on the other hand you want to have cash to throw around in that retirement for cruises and buying a wife. Work hard play hard is the philosophy I’d go by, if you plan your time properly there’s time for both; in the mean time tell your friends they’re not missing much in those criminology lectures they’re skiving.


I’ve completely maxed out my overdraft and there’s still six weeks left of term… What can I do?

Well you may be an irresponsible moron but at least you’re not a spoilt little princess. Assuming the bank of daddy is closed to you then you could enter this special place in which you offer your services in exchange for money – the very thing you seek! This not-so-exclusive place is called the job market. The university jobshop is located on the ground floor of the union, register with them and they should be able to sort you out with something.


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