I tried to make my own May Ball in Animal Crossing: New Horizons

This time last year, I was looking forward to my first revelrous frivolous May Week, in which I had no responsibilities and no alcohol tolerance. This year, however, I don’t know when the end of term actually is and have lost all concept of time. Can I have played 170 hours of Animal Crossing: New Horizons? Surely not. It’s okay though, because to compensate for the garden parties / May Balls / evenings spent drinking Pimms on Coe Fen that I’m missing, I sunk hours into a game in which I do menial tasks to earn bells to pay my mortgage to tanuki overlord, Tom Nook.

Except, however, when I’m suffering from crippling nostalgia and instead spend thousands to source funky lights and outdoor toilets and a market stall that looks like the Hallouman’s. (what I would give for another cardboard plate of halloumi fries!)

The dance floor

I can’t remember much of last year’s  May Ball, which is possibly for the better. I have a vague recollection of bopping along to the ABBA set, then lying down for a nap, but that’s also an apt description of most of my weekends anyway. But who needs ABBA, or Tinchy Stryder, or Daft Funk, when you’ve got K.K. Slider’s slick tunes?

K.K. Bubblegum is a BOP and I will not be listening to other opinions

The toilets

Cleaner than any others I’ve seen, to be honest. We’ve got posh toilets for you lot who bought VIP tickets (how does a champagne reception differ from, you know, just drinking champagne??), and portaloos for everyone else. I know as well as you do that the strategically placed bins and brush will not be used, and that at 1am when you’re absolutely bursting there will be no toilet roll left and that the loo will be clogged up and the taps aren’t working and there isn’t any soap or antibacterial gel so to distract yourself from the feeling that you’re covered in other people’s germs you have another drink and go back into the night. Or was that just me?

Imagine that the floor is covered in soggy toilet roll and unidentifiable liquids, and you’re almost there

The food (and drink)

I still haven’t come across a DIY recipe for champagne-filled-punts, so it’s an alcohol-free night for me. On the flip side, we’ve got pizza, candyfloss and coffee for when 3am hits and you begin asking your friends Philosophical Questions. Or, in my case, crying because you’re going home the next day and the alcohol has made you overly sentimental and you don’t know how you’ll cope for three months without 10pm trips to Mainsbury’s.

Vegan options only thank you, this is an island populated solely by animals and one human Resident Representative

The entertainment

While sitting on the Ferris wheel last year was possibly the most romantic moment of my life (take note, guys and gals!), sitting on a bench near a teacup ride was as close as I could get at my own Maple May Ball. Nintendo, please! let! us! use! furniture! All I want to do is sit in the teacup ride :(( We’ve also got a fortune-telling bear, a swimming pool (not strictly May Ball entertainment, but perhaps a better alternative to drunkenly stumbling into the Cam) and a little pink horse because I thought it was cute.

Who says that romance is dead?

If I were to sum up my 2020 May Ball experience, it would be ‘that’s okay, because this is a seaplane’. But saying that – if any May Ball Presidents would like to offer me a committee position, you know where to find me. As you can see, I have an eye for both design and detail, and know what goes into a good May Ball – food, music, and above all, decent toilets.

All image credits to author