Boxing: Gown trounces Town in warm-up for Varsity

The safest way to enjoy a Saturday night fight.


Cambridge University Amateur Boxing Club (CUABC) eased past their opposition on Saturday night in front of a raucous sell-out crowd at the Guildhall. 16 of the 20 bouts were Town vs. Gown contests, with the University winning all but 3 of them. The remaining 4 saw blue-on-blue action as eight CUABC fighters took on their rivals for a spot at varsity.

Here’s a bout-by-bout run-down of the evening’s action.

Bout One: Matthew ‘Rum Knuckles’ Elliot

The boxers took to the ring in front of a highly partisan crowd, one whose thirst would not be quenched by beer alone. Elliot didn’t disappoint in a somewhat “rustic” bout, which took its toll on both boxers. However, after some heavy punches in the 3rd round his opponent was left staggering like a newly-born giraffe, giving CUABC in the red corner a win by unanimous decision.

Two: Madeleine ‘The Blue Blitz’ Hyde

This was an incredibly composed fight from the University Boxer, who barely blinked as she dominated her opponent throughout the contest. A few apparent knocks to the town-fighter’s chin saw the referee stop the fight so she could readjust her headguard. Another unanimous decision in the red corner’s favour.

Three: Raf ‘The Razorblade’ Bertoli

These two agile fighters were well-matched, with both taking the punches well without noticeably tiring. Bertoli came out quickly and always looked to be on the front foot. His strategy came off to make it three in a row for gown.

Four: Lawrence ‘The Titan’ Tan

Tan came up against a highly skilled boxer. After landing some good punches in the first, Tan came off worse in the third after a suspiciously low blow. With our man clearly hurt his coach had no choice but to throw in the towel. There are some hits no one should take for the team.

Five: Darius ‘The Samurai’ Zarrabian

In an almost surreal contest, the university boxer seemed to almost relish being punched, delivering two for every one he took. By the third round his opponent was swinging wildly, with fewer hits than your average Varsity article (sorry guys). Another red win.

Six: Elliot ‘The Pudding’ Tebboth

They call him the pudding because the proof is in. The CUABC captain and varsity champion proved his ability within the first round, peppering his opponent with several high-speed sequences. Soon the town boxer could take no more, resigning with a bruised rib to the crowd’s disappointment.

Seven: Alistair ‘Ali G’ Greenwood

Despite being floored (seemingly by his own footwork) in the first, Ali G battered his opponent. The evening was sponsored by botox specialist, Dr Sue, but it was Greenwood who gave his opponent a free nose-job on his way to a unanimous victory.

Eight: Hannah ‘Streetfighter’ Streat

Nothing streetfighter-esque about this performance. Our boxer came through easily against an opponent with a weaker defence than a shoplifter caught on CCTV. The victories were racking up for gown.

Nine: Josh ‘Wait for it…’ Willcox

Perhaps the pick of the first half bouts in terms of entertainment. Both fighters took heavy blows, and by the third it looked like either could hit the floor. The referee came away with blood on his shirt, and despite a strong effort Willcox came off second best.

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The referee's shirt took a mild splattering in Willcox's bout.

Ten: Emma 'The Beast' Baghurst

Rounding off the first half, ….. eased to victory against her opponent, who had no choice but to throw in the towel.

Eleven: Judah ‘The Wrecking Ball’ Aiyenuro

The crowd favourite walked into the ring to the sound of his name being chanted through the hall. Up against a boxer at least a head taller than himself, Aiyenuro never looked phased. Easy pickings for CUABC.

Twelve: James ‘The Hong Kong Hurricane’ Kuo

Kuo started off with a delightful show of skill, weaving around his heavier opponent’s punches. As the fight went the winds changed for the hurricane as he started to take more hits. Eventually lost by unanimous decision.

Thirteen: Jovan Tasev

Not much to say. Tasev’s punches were quick, the bout even quicker as the ref intervened after the town boxer appeared concussed.

Fourteen: Alexander ‘Slick’ Stoilov

His opponent’s performance taught me where the expression ‘ropey’ probably comes from. Stoilov got the job done with ease, always on the front foot. Unanimous points decision in his favour.

Fifteen: Claudia ‘The Pocket Rocket’ Tam vs. Roshni Gohil

The first all gown affair was a well-matched bout, with Gohil eventually taking the win by unanimous decision having earlier floored her opponent. Commended by judges and referee.

Sixteen: Harry ‘Popeye’ Holdstock

The varsity welterweight champion was certainly given a run for his money, coming up against a strong opponent from Peterborough Police in an entertaining bout. After Holdstock dominated the first, his opponent recovered only for the Cambridge man to hold on, albeit only by majority.

Seventeen: Aiden ‘Buster’ Cope

Two majority decisions in a row! The university boxer showed great skill, making efficient use of the body-shot to edge out his opponent.

Eighteen: Ciaran ‘Doppiazzo’ Hill vs. James Lee

CUABC vs. CUABC maybe, but there were no pulled punches in this bout. By the third round Lee was dominating ex-captain and current president Hill to win by unanimous decision.

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Hill (red shorts) vs. Lee

Nineteen: Tim ‘The Beast from the East’ Benger vs. Dom ‘The Balrog’ Hall

Hotly contested, arms swinging like windmills and Hall delivering a near knockout punch with forty seconds left in the first. Hall came out on top.

Twenty: Stephen ‘Chanimal’ Chan

In all honesty I had left by this stage, so don’t know the name of the second Cambridge fighter. Sorry. However, a friend kindly described it to me as ‘very close’ and ‘gritty’, with Chan coming out the champion.

All in all, this was a highly encouraging evening for Cambridge boxing before Varsity on 9th March.

A charitable collection took place on behalf of Jimmy’s, who work to provide emergency accommodation and supported housing in Cambridge.