You don’t need to be angry to be a feminist

I’m a feminist and I believe in equality.

But I’m sick and tired of the modern-day man-haters. It’s as if they just want to hate men.

Mary Angelou once stated, “I’m a feminist. I’ve been female for a long time now. It’d be stupid not to be on my own side.” She was wrong.

The problem with modern day feminism is that it’s become about taking a side. If anyone does anything that might even slightly be considered offensive by a feminist, they’re wrong.  

They get pissed off over everything. If I want to buy expensive, luxury tampons and wear them rather than free bleeding, that’s OK. If I want to treat my boyfriend to a meal, or god-forbid make him a sandwich, or wear a low cut top to make his eyes pop, don’t get mad at me. I might even wear pink because it makes me feel “girly” or let my hair grow long, that doesn’t make me a bad feminist, that just makes me me.

Wearing make-up doesn’t make me a bad feminist either, it means that I’m liberated enough to have my own style, to be who I want to be. And I want to be that girl who wears a little bit of make-up.

Long hair, don’t care

And if I want to shave my vag, get over it.

Having a man that is attracted to smooth, hairless legs doesn’t make him a bad person, it’s just personal preference, so don’t get cross. And If he happened to become employed to become the CEO of a top tech company, don’t start a protest, maybe he had the right qualification, gave a good interview and treats his clients well.

Not having a girl squad and hanging out with guys doesn’t make a bad feminist either. We’re not all Taylor Swift, we don’t have to collect girls just to show that we’re feminists. And guys actually don’t have cooties.

Slight offence makes a guy a misogynist and means that a girl is betraying her “own side”.

That’s not what it’s about, feminism at it’s core should be about equality. Women in the early 1900s didn’t fight for us to get the vote just so we could switch with men or so that we could be better than them or have more power. It was so we could vote for the right people to lead us. The people who believe in equality, which once in a while, could be a man.

Emma Watson shows, in my opinion, what feminism should be, her HeForShe campaign makes perfect sense. It’s the branch of feminism that includes men, it lets them see why we need gender equality, it’s about educating men. It doesn’t tear them down and tell them that they don’t matter anymore because this is the era of the feminazi.

#squadgoals

Being a feminist is about dealing with the important issues, the ones that matter in the gender divide, equal pay, sexual objectification, encouraging bright young leaders (both male and female). So yes, get angry when the pay gap (even at universities) for women can be up to £7k and more lower. Get angry when a person chooses to objectify someone’s body, get angry when someone is told they are worthless because of their gender but don’t make it about having a side of male or female. The only side you should be taking is that of equality.

The problem is that so many role models tell us to take sides, most likely subconsciously but it’s still not OK. Ariel Winter recently responded to slut shaming of a photo of her on Instagram,

https://www.instagram.com/p/-CJzpyExS6/?taken-by=arielwinter

And I agree with nearly everything she says. Except the last comment; “Us girls have to stick together!” Actually, we as a people need to stick together, brothers, fathers, sisters, mothers, every single member of her family should stick by her. All of her friends, male or female, need to stand with her and show those people that it’s not ok to slut shame someone.

It’s about time we stopped making feminism about taking a side and made it about taking a stand. Together.