Don’t hate me because I’m in Wills

Okay, we’ve all heard it “the Wills on the bus go rah rah rah.”  But mate, do they really?

Let’s be honest, who have you ever spoken to in Wills? Probably not one person. So babe, just chill out, let it go, and move on for Christ’s sake.

Go take a trip to UWE and contemplate how you actually would rather be there than live in Wills, cause we all know you definitely wouldn’t.

You probably cried to mummy when you didn’t get into la-di-da Durham, so honey I doubt UWE would be for you. Trust xoxo

Oh, and stop yakking about us.

Brutal

If you are already infuriated with what I’ve preached then you can understand only a sole 10% of how I feel every time I drunkenly get on the 16 on my way to Bunker, with the entirety of the Bus chanting hate at Wills.

“I’d rather be in ISIS than in Wills.” 

Bitch please, go say that to David Haines’ family who, if you aren’t aware, got his head chopped off by ISIS. I’m sure they’d love to hear a bunch of supposedly well-educated teenagers make a mockery of their son’s death. Arseholes.

But “Livi,” you moan, “Wills really is full of posh twats who all went to private school.” How dreadful!  But where is your proof? Cause being actually from Wills, I’ve got a lot of evidence to prove the haters wrong.

It didn’t take me long to find three confident Wills residents, who were comfortable getting their face out there, and willing to share their thoughts on the abuse. None of them went to private school, and here’s what they want to say to the haters:

Herbie Williams, from Bishop Wordsworth School in Salisbury, “Everyone just isn’t like that here, get your facts right.”

Michael Bright, from Newham Sixth Form College in East London says, “We’re unfairly represented.”

Most sensitive of all, Alex Teale, from Myton School in Warwick says, “Get to know us first, and think before you speak. Words hurt.”

And it wasn’t just them who are pissed off, camera-shy residents were the most upset of all.  Katie Andrews from C Block wants the haters to: “Take a look in the mirror and re-think their life”. Harsh (but probz true).

Taking this one step further, residents chose to lash out at other halls,  Thomy Lawson from F Block, reminded us the real poshos reside elsewhere, “I know posher people at Badock”. And do you know what? DAMN RIGHT! Yes!

I’m now personally addressing you Badock. You might look homeless, but you aren’t fooling me at all. You’re all toffs in disguise, and your voice oozes with Eatonian panache.  You’re class tourists –  yet, you get away with it. How is this fair?

I went to Tokyo World ffs.. I can be edgy too?!

Moreover, It would be criminal to not add that Churchill is the place that really deserves the shit Wills Rep.

As the Tab discovered this year, Churchill is officially the poshest halls of residence. A whopping 70% of them went to private school, compared to Wills’ measly 62.9% and Hiatt Baker’s bigger score of 63.3%, proving they are also posh twats with some sort of identity crisis, choosing to hide behind rather wavey clothing, unwashed hair and an intense hate of everything Wills.

One anonymous Wills resident opened up to me about a traumatic freshers week experience, whereby a HB resident told her to “Fuck off” after she revealed she lived in Wills.  Fucking rude. But do you know what, I speak on behalf of Wills when I say:

none of us have a problem with any of you.

So stop all the hate, give us a chance. And, if you still have an issue how about you walk up that hill and have a game of Billiards with us in our Billiards room?  (You’d have to teach us how to play though, cause we don’t have a clue).

lol

Oh and tea and cake on us darling x

“Don’t judge a book by its cover.”