Here are some UoB landlord horror stories we can all relate to

Who needs hot water anyway?

Students notoriously have a bad reputation. Everyone thinks we’re lazy, messy and obnoxiously rude. But have you come into contact with a uni landlord? That’s a whole new ball game.

Having spoken to multiple students, they feel landlords consistently provide them with less-than-adequate conditions, whilst simultaneously gaslighting them into thinking it’s acceptable.

Here is a roundup of some of your Birmingham landlord horror stories.

Anonymous, third year

“Whilst we were out the landlord came round to do some work in a room. We came back to find the biggest shit known to mankind in our toilet. Without being too grotesque, it was terrifyingly big, honestly, he gave birth to it. To this day I still fathom how a human could do that without surgical assistance.”

“Also, the radiator ended up leaking everywhere with old, stagnant water. My room stunk like a pond. There were huge holes in the walls, and dry bits of the wall kept falling into our beds and the floor.”

Katie, second year

“I have the cast of ‘A Bug’s Life’ living in my room.”

Anonymous, fourth year

“Our landlord did some renovations in the house over the summer. What we didn’t know was there would be no working bathrooms, no hot water and no heating. One of our housemates had a toilet in the middle of her room. We were still expected to pay full rent and when we asked for compensation or a deadline for the work finishing, our landlord claimed we were bullying him.”

Anonymous, second year

“The landlord came round to check on our rooms. We pointed out a full-length mirror was missing from someone’s room, even though everyone else has one and it’s on the inventory. To this, she replied ‘don’t you think it’s a bit vain to want a mirror?'”

Lexie, second year

“The window to my room didn’t shut so I emailed the landlord to get it sorted asap. Their response was I don’t live in a hotel so I shouldn’t be so demanding. They then blamed me for taking so long to notice.”

Anonymous, third year

“When we moved in, we were told the house had been professionally cleaned. There were cigarettes in the sink and the fridge was full of mould. Every time it rained our living room would completely flood, and the carpet was mouldy and smelly. Of course, when we moved out, they blamed us for the flooding and tried to charge us!”


But don’t worry, there are some good eggs out there, with incredible film references …

Imogen, second year

“I asked if I could keep my one-year-old Leopard Gecko at the house. The landlord said it would be absolutely fine unless it got into an accident with some nuclear waste and went on a rampage!”

Related stories recommended by this writer

•Liz Truss visits Selly Oak amid cost-of-living crisis

•What ‘Little Miss’ character would your halls be

•Here are all the events happening at Birmingham for Black History Month