THE SOTON TAB Q&A LIVEBLOG EXTRAVAGANZA
We’re here, we’re elections, get used to it
Welcome to the Soton Tab SUSU Elections Q&A Meet the candidates live blog
You know it, you love it, we’re giving it to you – It’s the Soton Tab Q&A Liveblog Extravaganza.
We’re here LIVE and PROUD from The Bridge to keep you up to date with the candidates as they navigate felt tip campaign clothing, the sharp questions from the comely and mumsy duet of Ellie Wermter and Sam Williams, and masking how drunk they are.
Just keep refreshing to keep up to date, god bless us all.
GOD BLESS THE SOTON TAB AND EVERYONE WHO ATTENDED TONIGHT.
MERRY CHRISTMAS, EVERYONE.
IT HAS FINISHED.
He just said there are no problems at all with SUSU, why is he making changes?
And we have hit the 10 o’clock mark guys. How many hours of my life have I wasted?
Zehong going last has got the advantage of everyone being drunk. He might gain another 3 or 4 votes.
Costume corner: Sleek, sexy and sly. The man is a sneaky little fox and without making any comment on his body, I will be buying him a drink tonight.
He would definitely get my vote if I hadn’t already voted.
People raising eyebrows at Zehong shouting in the mic but he’s the first one to get my attention all night.
Zehong just keeps talking about being an engineer. We don’t care. We really don’t.
Zehong is being reminded to talk in to the microphone. Want those hard hitting policies to be heard!
Clap Clap CLAP.
Sam Bailey says the most important thing SUSU can do is “support the student groups”.
He literally came over to rub it in that he’s been getting free beer.
We would like to confirm that Bridie is equal favourite.
Michael Oliver – Our favourite Wessex Scene Ed has come over for a chat.
“What about post grad students?” – Pandering to the wrong audience maybe?
“Some people don’t want to criticise sabbs” – not the soton tab!!
Anonymous twitter…sounds a lot like Yik Yak Liiban. Not exactly original.
Been told to only talk about politics now so here’s a really good op-ed on the troubles Donald Trump may face in the primaries tonight
Love this pun though shout outs to DCI Candidate Michael Clarke
Huge shoutout to SUSU for systematically humiliating the only candidate out of 21 who isn’t a part of the clique. No grillings in sixteen Q&As until this one. Big entertainment, loved watching this massive outsider get laughed at by a capacity crowd of thirty seven fleeces
It got so boring even one of the presenters left
Next up it’s Liiban who was too busy to be interviewed by us (EDITOR’S NOTE: THIS IS NOT STRICTLY TRUE)
“I do care”.
No hashtags? He has no campaign right there.
“My manifesto is complete rubbish”
President gets paid 20k a year pal. You need to take it seriously.
He pledged to make no pledges. What a misdemeanour that was.
He is quite clearly smiling through the tears.
Thomas Gravatt begin absolutely DESTROYED on his theoretical running of the SUSU policy.
Tom Gravatt arguing that students should not engage with SUSU.
Tom Gravatt is up for the grilling now!
Alex Hovden is refusing to leave the stage! It’s like Adele at the Brits all over again.
Let’s hope everyone is getting more and more drunk. Maybe it will make it more exciting.
We have stickers if any of you lovely people in the Bridge want to come and compliment us.
Would like to retract our comment about Bryony – she has just come over and confirmed they were actually skinnies.
Alex Hovden is the first president candidate to be questioned.
Are we horrible people? Maybe. But we’re more entertaining than this Q+A session. #Savage.
I saw Bruno Russell picking his nose in Avenue cafe earlier. Classic SUSU clique.
The Soton Tab would like to make it clear that we still love Cameron and the way he nonchalantly crossed his legs.
Maybe if this was less boring we’d actually listen.
Just realised we haven’t listened to a single one of Cameron’s actual policies. #Priorities.
Person with a court jester style hat just walked in #legend
Tell you what guys, game back on at Carrow Road. An absolute thunderbolt from Nathan Redmond makes it 2-1. – Come on Norwich!
Costume Corner: Some fetching tie-dye elections shirts going on. Love the 1970s throwback.
Benjamin Lowrie loves Bridie Jones. Cross media relationship on the cards?
Bridie Pearson-Jones mentioned there, my sweetheart and the best unfulfilled friendship I’ll ever have. Bridie, why wont you come for drinks.
Thomas Gravatt has more followers than Shaheer khan.
Michael Clarke stepping up, the only candidate to have written for the Soton Tab!!
We should vote for her because she’s smiley #cringe
Guy the Democracy guy prowling The Bridge, pondering why he’s turned up with a purple cardigan draped over his pink t-shirt.
Ellie just gave Bryony 10 seconds! The pressure is ridiculous.
The amount of people looking at their phones/laptops/tablets makes me think more people are reading us than watching the interview #QualityEntertainment.
“I’ve recently become interested in democracy” – pro dictatorship previously then?
Ironic that I saw Kerry, the current DCI, wearing flared jeans yesterday. Maybe it’s a tradition.
Costume Corner: Purple t shirt which really compliments her, suits her and also makes her look fab. Bootcut jeans diminishes her creative industries credentials though.
A loud bang that just happened is the most exciting thing thats happened all evening.
BREAKING: We can confirm that SUSU the cat is not dead! Despite unsubstantiated reports on YIK YAK. The entire university community can breath a collective sigh of relief.
Bryony Newman up next for DCI. She will be followed by Michael Clarke and Cameron Meldrum. This position is hotly contested.
The Harry Potter quiz has finished. It’s a sad time for all of us.
A screen showing achievements of sports teams? Just six packs please.
oooh Tom can’t announce things. Is it about your six pack, Tom?
Just been reprimanded for sexism to our great shame. We apologise to all men and all sabb officers
People coming up to us to praise/hate us #controversy. It’s an emotional rollercoaster over here.
We’ve been told off for talking about bums too much.
Tom Provan is stepping into the fire. The only candidate, he must be terrified.
Alice Hearing just threw us sooooo much shade! I’m scared.
Quickly. We’ve been given a few minutes to replace the life elixir that is beer, wine and cider.
David Alwright is taking too long to answer his questions. He loves welfare. Absolutely fucking loves it.
Getting married at this age is like leaving a house party at 9pm.
No fire on sabbs at all but David Allwright is married and imagine simultaneously holding the titles of ‘Husband’ and ‘Student Union Official’.
David Allwright is feeling ALLLLLLRIGHT!
The girl opposite us has actually fallen ASLEEP!
We try our best.
People in the room growing to hate us even more as they read us insult them
She’s gone from running the cinema to running for VP Welfare – Someone’s been watching Carry on Doctor.
Christina Vinothan running for Welfare is coping well under pressure.
His name is Thomas Gravatt and he’s running for President, so he’s fair game really.
Tom Cross pulls a Jeb and asks for an applause.
#dickwatch his dick is coming out
Soton Tab would like to clarify that gendered clothing is a Victorian social construct and we don’t condone bullying on gendered lines THAT BEING SAID he’s gonna pop out any second.
Ponytail guy’s jeans are so tight they look like they were bought in the women’s department
Let’s all socialise when we have exams! Jesters before a 9am exam that’s 60% of your grade? Why not?
Diego Costa’s just put Chelsea 2-0 up lads!!!!! – Another reason tonight just got even more depressing.
George is arguing that students should be socialising rather than studying during exam period.
His ponytail kind of counteracts the smartness of his suit.
A man with a two foot long ponytail walked in and every Tab editor simultaneously reached for their phone.
Thomas Gravatt with a bum length ponytail!!!!!!!
George Seabrook is preparing to go up next – The fear in his eyes in front of the headlights that are Tom and Ellie is evident.
What has gone largely unspoken in all of this is the colour of Elliott’s trousers. He’s gone for beetroot red chinos. No further comment.
It’s heating up.
Sam undoes another button on his shirt.
Power sockets: a big issue for Elliott.
Ellie Wermter asks if more students in the library would be a bad thing. Elliot says no, obviously.
Hard to focus on the education policy chat with all the skin on show. Put it away Elliott!
The bar staff are looking LOVELY in their pink election tops.
Costume Corner: Elliott Grater with one too many buttons undone – Miami Vice wants their shirt back.
Elliot Grater is up next – The tantalising anticipation can be felt throughout the room.
How many pints do you think we can get through before we lose the will to live?
Ruchika seems a lot like she has no idea what’s going on with the election.
Tom Cross: “I’m so hot.”
Enemy of the Tab and 8th biggest BNOC Jay Ham just collected glasses from our table – it was a tense moment for all involved.
Costume Corner: Ruchika is very sensibly dressed. Seminar? Check. Elections event? Check. Ket fuelled all-nighter? Checkaroo.
Ruchika Menon admits she knew nothing when she wrote her manifesto
Worth saying that Rebecca Lake is a lovely gal who’s done well under a very disproportionate grilling
Ruchika Menon’s turn to be grilled by the media powerhouse of Tom and Ellie.
Shame the nhs don’t feel the same.
Rebecca Lake thinks medics should do less work so they have more time to engage with the union.
Rebecca Lake wants to do things outside of the union rather than for them.
Rebecca Lake can’t make promises according to Tom – calm down Jeremy Paxman
SOMEONE STOP TOM CROSS
Tom Cross has called her inappropriate a million times already which is odd for a man I’ve seen down a jesticle he found on the floor.
When Rebecca lake uses a show full of incest and murder to promote her campaign.
Tom Cross hitting Rebecca Lake with the tough questions: “Do you think your Game of Thrones theme was a good idea?
The scarf certainly suggests she is ready for this cold weather. Let’s see what else she was born ready for.
Flora Nobel: “I was born ready”
ALERT: There is a Harry Potter quiz down stairs by the bean bag chairs in SUSU. The crowd is bigger than this.
Tom Cross has replaced Sam Williams as co-presented with Ellie Wermter. Those camera lights were too much.
And we have our first rest break. God it’s bliss.
The pita-pata of applause is reminiscent of a talent show at an old peoples home.
Can Sam Williams start a question without “So you mention…”
Just got off to probably the least ceremonial start in the history of live events – they literally just started talking and we all slowly stopped.
ANNNNDDDDD we’re off! Sam Williams and Ellie Wermter are interviewing Dan Varley.