I’m glad I didn’t go to a Russell Group uni

I’m not posh and I never will be.

I was born in the quaint area of County Durham. Based on the location of the house I grew up in and the very stuffy, elitist, Catholic secondary school I went to, I had all the potential to become a rahh Durham girl and glide off to Durham university after barely breaking a sweat over my A* A-levels.

Obviously, this didn’t happen. I broke my back to get mediocre A Levels, still didn’t reach the entry requirement for Northumbria and got in on what must have been my personal statement alone. Hell, I nearly ended up at Sunderland.

She’s a Poly

All stereotypes and pre-conceived notions aside, Newcastle just wouldn’t have accepted that.

They would have wanted ABB minimum and regardless whether I sent naked selfies in with my application they’d have still laughed me out of their foyer before I’d even noticed they don’t actually do the degree I was applying for.

Do the cool kids at Newcastle have better grades than me? Yes (that’s not hard, I’m not an academically gifted individual).

Do I care? Do I fuck.

#NOTBOTHERED

Put it this way, a Russell group red brick university like Newcastle doesn’t even recognise what I do as an actual degree. Had I gone there, I’d be stuck in three years of an English Literature degree to go on to the exciting career of teaching English literature.

I haven’t even graduated Northumbria and I’ve had work published in local papers, glossy magazines and The Sun. I’m applying for a scholarship to do my masters and I’ve only reached the minimum level of wanting to top myself from the stress of third year.

It’s not just the North East where “Red Bricks” are becoming more of a posh joke than an actual option. The universities which were seen tumbling down the uni scoreboards last year were University College London and its Russell Group BFF Cambridge.

The London School of Economics (LSE), UCL’s neighbour and fellow member of the elite Russell Group of research-focused universities also suffered, losing its place in the top three to St Andrews.

Though it might not be achingly obvious, Cambridge plays host to freshers who flunk out in first year just like the rest of the schools they turn their noses up at. In 2014, Red Brick Uni Edinburgh suffered a loss of 10 students a term. 

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What bothers me so much of about the Russell Group uni closest to me is that despite having “Newcastle” scrawled across it in massive letters, I’d be too embarrassed and quite frankly would not feel adequate enough to rock up with my VERY North East accent and be all “Wey aye pet, can I come and study here?”

Newcastle was originally known for being a working class city, so why does the university that gets to say it’s ours look like it’s taking the piss out of us?

I’m glad I went to a polytechnic uni because I’d rather be thought of as thick than unhappy. I’d rather be told “Half a degree at Newcastle is better than a first at Northumbria” than have a better degree and be a miserable twat.