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Living in a far-out college – a burden or a safe-haven?

“I heard that some girl didn’t take her offer from Cambridge because Girton was too far away” – WO, 2018. Hm, questionable reasoning.

There is an extraordinary amount of stigma towards colleges that are remotely far out from the centre of Cambridge and quite honestly I can see why. I am prone to the odd bitch or two but, like a therapist would ask its client to do, I’ve decided to tell you why it's not that bad.

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Textbook chat when talking about where I live

Girton and Homerton seem to be singled out as the second cousin twice removed colleges of Cambridge. If they were people, King’s would visit them maybe at Christmas, provided that they would be getting presents. Perhaps with the hope of getting a new set of walking boots, because that’s what King’s pops on their feet in a morning when going to meet their friends, Trinity and Pembroke.

I’m pretty fit. And I also have gotten in better shape since starting university, as, on average, 4 times a day I cycle to and from Homerton, and I swear to God by third year I’m going to have thighs of steel. The top half of my body is going to be horribly underwhelming in comparison. I’ll look like a burning candle, melting from the top, but still firm at the base.

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always prepared with a bike helmet on, and a chair apparently

Seriously though, the cycle to town usually takes around 13 minutes – yes, I am a bit sweaty (extremely sweaty, actually so disgustingly greasy post-cycle, but think I’m just more unfit than your average Susie), but 13 minutes isn’t that big a deal. It’s enough time to listen to a decent amount of music, though not too long that you have to take a pack lunch for the journey.

If I wasn’t cycling, in that same 13 minutes, I’d probably make some coffee, do some research for an essay and by the 13th minute find myself taking a BuzzFeed quiz entitled, ‘Your Pizza Options Will Reveal How Many Children You’ll Have’. It’s a good use of my time. The cycling, that is, not the extremely niche Buzz Feed quiz referenced.

“Apparently you can walk on the grass at Homerton (Gasp)! This gives you the pleasure of halving cross-college journey times and telling all your jealous friends about it” – @Ed~D on The Student Room

It’s true! All my supervisions and lectures are in Homerton, so lets say I have a supervision at 10am, I can wake up at 9.55, brush my teeth, get dressed, CROSS THE GRASS and get to my supervision. If the grass were off limits, we’d be looking at an alarm set for 9.52, which would just be ridiculous.

Don’t mean to sound like a keen farmer but the grounds we have at Homerton are aesthetically attractive, yet still spatially generous. NB: I’m sure all colleges are great and special in their own way, just going to give you a lowdown-throwdown on Homerton, or as some of the more endearing Homertonians call Home(rton). *Passive Aggressively* Cute right? So, I went on a ‘walk’ around college the other day, through the pear orchard (christ it’s middle class), past the sports grounds and into the forest. I say forest its about 10 meters deep but its very tree-y so hence qualifies as a forest in my books. I don’t want to exaggerate, but I could literally have a camping party at college – pretty cool if you ask me. Seriously though, when I get really stressed or feel overwhelmed by things – I’m milking this by acting all coy, by things I just mean work – I go for a walk around college. I put my headphones in, listen to some tearjerkers, imagine I’m in a really low-budget music video, and sit in the pear orchard (doesn’t sound any less ridiculous the second time, I know).

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Standing on grass woaah ft. a very tight suit

“However [being able to walk on grass] does remove the illegal thrill from post-formal lawn stomping” – @Ed~D on The Student Room

To be fair, they’ve got a really valid point, but do not fret. There are many illegal thrills you can engage yourself with instead, such as not returning a library book before its due date or just go ahead and steal my Lurpak, because that’s a common felony I seem to be the victim of. Hop on board the bandwagon.

"the" orchard I "speak" "of"

It is the point in the article that I should reach a moral conclusion. So here it is, if you get an offer from a central college, decline it and then reapply to Homerton. Or, drop out now and reapply.

I jest (ooo, some Shakespeare for you). Living in a ‘far-out’ college really isn’t the burden it is made out to be. I applied to Homerton (rogue), but am so glad I did as even though it is a bit of a mission, there are so many advantages to living here, in the same way that living in a central college has its perks. We’re all just super lucky and should go and get matching tattoos to celebrate.