Meet the freshers: ‘I hate people. I hope my future friends do too’

Freshers’ Facebook groups are a really good way for newbies to check out their new flatmates are going to be, to ask any questions they may need answering and give them enough time to thoroughly stalk each one and decide which lucky individual is going to be their new BFF.

However, for some people the excitement and anticipation gets the better of them.

There are always a few freakishly keen freshers that flood the Facebook pages daily with posts either asking stupid questions and poorly designed attempts to make themselves Trent’s latest BNOC.

Anil is clearly hoping for BNOC fame and fortune this year. Sadly he won’t gain the recognition he deserves for his luscious lips.

But there will be no limits to this joker’s choice of fancy dress on Ocean Wednesdays. Also the choice of frame here it really adds that extra wow factor.

Anita is standing for no shit this year. Our guess is she’s an “I said I’d clean it later” kind of girl.

Revising is going to be a tough time for this fresher if she can’t even remember where she lives. #PrayForSeranne

A Print journalism student who lives in Norton Court!? This girl has great taste. The only thing that could make her better is if she was a Block 4 girl.

When someone said the bond of hatred is stronger than loving the same things they meant something a little less drastic than the entire human race. Maybe she should be directing this appeal for friendship to a species that she doesn’t despise.

49 hours work for £116.54…is that even legal!?

Freshers regularly confuse these pages as a dating website. Now that you have confessed your love for “making out” in the sunset you will never be mistaken for Will Smith again.

“I just need a cycle buddy.” Don’t we all!

Deep words of wisdom there Ciaran. So glad that those days are behind us now.

Classic case of using a joke to cover up genuine desires here. Charlotte we heard you loud and clear: Turtle Bay all the way.

Date for diary: Eurovision party. Be sure to arrive in plenty of time to familiarise yourself with the “official rules sheet”.

Come on. Where’s your sense of adventure.

Oh darling. A real first world problem.

Clearly a charmer that loves unay. Maybe the capital letters are making up for something.

Did your mum not warn you about stranger danger Corey.

You’re hungover and need food. This is possibly the most frustrating thing.

If you don’t lose your phone in freshers you have not been doing it properly.