Undercover Fresher: 007 days of Freshers’ week

The Stand gets it’s own undercover fresher to report on the traumatic week we’ve all pushed to the back of our minds.

Saturday set the week off with a bang as I spent hours moving my things into my room, learning (and forgetting immediately) the names of everyone in my hall, while attempting to push past that awkward ‘everyone is new and no one knows what to do about it’ phase. Later, my hall organised a ‘pub crawl’ (if you can call visiting two pubs a pub crawl) to ease everyone into the first night out on the town. After a couple of hours, we headed to the Union for the highly anticipated UV Bubble Rave.

Now, you have to understand that all the girls in my hall were baffled as to what to wear to the Bubble Rave. After considering everything from the amount of foam to the damaging effects of UV paint, we finally emerged with outfits we were willing to ruin. When we arrived at the Union and realised that ‘foam’ was really just ‘bubbles’ and that there wasn’t nearly enough UV paint to ruin anything, we were slightly disappointed. Plagued by that ‘too-sober-to-wait-in-queue-for-drink-and-not-drunk-enough-to-leave-yet’ attitude, we left earlier than expected and resolved to have a better time at Clan Warfare the next night.

Whipping up my own dinner on my floor’s kitchen on Sunday night induced one of those typical Fresher, ‘Look who’s responsible now!’ moments, and I had to suppress the urge to send my mum a photo of my first homemade meal (grease and all).

Later that night, dressed in my hall colours and covered in face paint, I went down to the pre-drink event that my hall was hosting. Considering that the alcohol was free and, well, I’m excessively cheap, I reverted to being the hall squirrel and started hoarding. Many drinks later, off we marched to the Union, fuelled by hall-spirit. Determined to win the bloody thing, we screamed and chanted until our voices were hoarse. Eventually I found my way back to my hall (frankly, I am amazed I made it back in one piece) and passed out on my bed, smeared face paint and all. What can I say? It’s Freshers Week.

Don’t be fooled by my seemingly casual tone; being a Keen Fresher, every trip to the Union is just an opportunity to scope out potential academic parents. I have even considered tattooing ‘PLEASE ADOPT ME’ on my forehead, just to be safe.

Tune in for the rest of this week as the Undercover Fresher joins every society under the sun (bound to happen), countinues the hunt for academic parents, and tries her best to avoid the seemingly inescapable Freshers Flu.