Ben Isle: On politics (no pun intended)

This Monday it was formally announced that a General Election is going to take place on the 15th and 16th of March in St Andrews. The dissolution of parliament and the onslaught of election campaigns has dramatically affected life ‘inside the bubble,’ or dans le Bublé, if you’ll excuse my French. I decided not to run in these elections. David Cameron was not involved in student politics, but over the last year or so he has managed to become influential in other types of politics. Although I am not David Cameron, I should have been offered a place at Oxford.

This general election has raised a number of important political issues, such as should people who aren’t able to buy computers still have the right to vote? Mrs Suffragette was famous for thinking that people without computers should have the right to vote. She sadly died whilst thinking this under a horse.

In the 2012 election, every constituency is important, but if you consider the whole picture, some constituencies seem unimportant. For example, the MP for ‘Mermaids’ represents a tiny minority of mythical creates in St Andrews, like the MP for Ethnic Minorities. The real race is for the position of Prime Minister. Having taken a history module in first year I understand that politics is just history, but in the present. However, some history of the past is useful too. General elections were first invented in Greece around the time that pot painting really took off. In modern history the role of the Prime Minister of St Andrews has dramatically increased in importance since the monarchy fled St Andrews.

It is impossible to guess who will win the upcoming election, but I would like to make a prediction. Having analysed the opinion poll taken in my art history tutorial, it is safe to say that there are clear forerunners, but that’s just an opinion. Empirically speaking the candidates most likely to gain a term of office are the candidates who most people are thinking of voting for. There are factors, other than votes, that influence the general election in St Andrews. No comfortable majority was won on votes alone, a candidate must have leaflets, t-shirts, banners, a trial version of Photoshop, and a facebook campaign. The best presidential facebook campaign so far has been for the early nominee, Kony.

Having taken a political philosophy module in first year I have also been able to spot some of the ideologies present in this election. I have noticed that in some of these posters the eyes of the candidates follow you wherever you go. For example, this poster for writer and director of The Da Vinci Code, Leonardo da Vinci who is standing for the position of DoSDA. All these posters that are watching you are obviously just like 1984, but they are not like The Great Gatsby, which is another book that I have read. Although this is not yet a fascist dictatorship it is well on its way to fascism. There are some striking differences between this election and other fascist elections. In this election everyone seems to be speaking English.

Whilst it is true that this is all speculation, such is the nature of journalism. You have to speculate to accumulate. Carpe Diem. C’est la vie. However, I would like to make a prediction for the Prime Ministerial election. I will predict that one candidate will win the upcoming election. That’s right readers – Ben has predicted a winner of the upcoming election. TTFN. Ben.