Soton’s Maddest Fresher 2018: Heat Three
What an absolute shambles
The final heat has arrived. Drunken trips, tattoo guns and handjobs…is one of these boys Soton’s Maddest Fresher? Cast your votes now!
Matt Reeve, Civil Engineering
Matt was on his way back from Switch, trying to make the long, cold walk a bit more bearable by jumping between these little podiums he found. He was drunk, so of course Matt slipped and fucked his face for the next three weeks.
Archie Ball, Accounting and Finance
In the mere seven days of Freshers’ Week Archie managed to do the following: climb onto the roof of a moving taxi, piss in a girl’s wardrobe on a one-night-stand thinking it was her ensuite and accidentally drink piss out of a can thinking it was cider. He also purchased a tattoo gun off the internet and whipped it out in pres. A wild week for sure.
Jack Collins, Politics and International Relations
Jack was enjoying another night at Oceana. He was having a dance in the cheese room when he saw a girl who he thought was fit, so he went over to her. They started dancing and kissing, until things got a bit heated and she slipped her hand down his trousers and gave him a hand job in the middle of the dance floor. As grateful as he was, Jack isn’t interested – unfortunately she’s been calling him ever since.