Every single type of mate you will have during summer

There’s always one


Summer is finally here! Time to forget all about how exams went and enjoy days in the sun (hopefully) with your friends. And over this period of time you will begin to realise some of your mates are different to the rest of them – if you haven’t already.

The holidaymaker

There is that one friend who always seems to be on holiday. They’ll have separate holidays with their family, uni mates, their boyfriend/girlfriend etc, and will love to tell you all about them. Whether they’re half way across the world or closer to home, their snapchat story constantly features the classic ‘plane wing’ shot or a couple of suitcases on the airport floor. This is always followed up by pictures of cocktails on the beach, lavish meals and water sports activities. Then to add insult to injury they will  come back with a tan, belittling the attempt you made in your back garden. But you love them anyway, despite them making it difficult to make any sort of group plans by saying “can we do this next week because i’m back for a few days before jetting off somewhere else again?”.

Catching flights u know the drill

The traveller

A normal, relaxing holiday is not good enough for this person. What this mate requires is one long-haul flight, a hiking rucksack, a pair of walking boots and shit-ton of bug repellent. They love it. Well, you know what they say: one man’s “all-inclusive to Majorca” is another man’s “shitting into a bucket in Malaysia”. This mate of yours will be away for at least three weeks in an exotic location undoubtedly being more cultured than you whilst you sit at home doing fuck all. Perhaps the only comfort you can derive from your traveller mate is the present they might bring back for you or the fact they’ll only be able to do one trip per summer because it’s fucking expensive. But you can be sure to enjoy seeing their endless adventures over and over again on Instagram and Facebook.

The worker

Now this is the mate who, no matter what else is going down, is always working. Even if there’s a party tomorrow night or a pub evening with the guys or gals, this friend will always come through with the “sorry guys i’ve got work tonight xxx have fun xx” text a few hours before. You might not even see them the whole summer – unless you catch them on their way to or from their job. Apparently to them their time is better spent stacking the shelves in Morrisons or waiting at a pub than with you and the rest of your mates. It will undoubtedly get on your nerves that they never show up at any kind of gathering your group puts together but, in all honesty, they’ll be the real winners when they begin second/third year with a fuck off bank balance.

The sesh gremlin

Incidentally, this friend is the complete opposite to ‘The worker’ in that they’re never working but always seem to have the money available to get on the sesh. This is the mate asking the group chat “spoons tonight lads?” on a regular basis and will always be more fucked than everyone else on any occasion. It seems that Uni has not tired out this mate, or if they’re a mate who doesn’t go to Uni then they’re just glad to get on the sesh and forget about the real-life job they have waiting for them on Monday. No matter who this friend is, they will always be down for anything, anytime. This is a mate you can rely on!

intimate squad pic

 The Uni mate(s)

You will have met them at Uni, become considerably good mates over the year and come back home with some great memories. For some it may have been surprisingly emotional saying goodbye to these mates at the final semester’s end. This has all resulted in your excitement to introduce them to your mates at home and now this new Uni friend or bunch of Uni friends are popping up in your home town, making appearances at your gatherings and evening getting on a flight abroad with you. Congratulations. You have successfully completed that drunken promise you both made during Freshers of being ‘best friends forever’. Although this friend does have its drawback. Do you really want your home mates and your Uni mates swapping embarrassing stories about you?