10 New Year’s Resolutions Lancs students probably should have made

Guilty as charged

We are nearing the end of January, which means that by this point, unless you are exceptionally dedicated, all New Year’s Resolutions have been well and truly broken. The promises of fitness regimes and health kicks have long since been abandoned, and cries of “oh only if I had made a different resolution!” have emerged, as you try and fail to drag yourself out of bed for a seven am gym session.

What New Year’s Resolutions should Lancs students have made? What would actually have made a helpful difference to our lives, and yet we happily ignore?

Take fewer pictures of the ducks

The ducks are certainly something of a Lancs institution – if the uni’s official Instagram account posts that many pictures of them, they definitely should be considered such. And yes, they are photogenic and in no way vicious, like some you hear about. Naturally, the desire to take photos is there. However, does one really need that many pictures of them on one phone? Maybe a couple of times a month, yes, but probably not every time you see them.

Find out what is actually in the Ruskin Library

For those of you who don’t know, it’s the weird shaped building next to the roundabout at the main entrance. And no one, I repeat, NO ONE, knows what is in there. It’s a mystery. An enigma. It could be anything. Anything at all. We could all find out, yes. Or we could leave it shrouded in mystery.

Stop talking about going to the Lake District for a day out and actually go

We are 40 minutes away on the train, so surely it is an easy day out for most people, especially as it’s one of the most beautiful places in the UK. However, you would be surprised how many of us keep talking about it but aren’t willing to fork out the tenner required to get there. Perhaps that should be everyone’s task for 2022. Together, Lancaster University can invade the Lake District.

Stop doing assignments at last minute 

This could probably go in a list of generic New Year’s resolutions for all students. But hey, I’ll do it when you do.

No? No promises? None from me either.

Stop draining student loans on Sultans and Greggs

It probably wouldn’t kill any of us to actually bring a packed lunch from home, for once. After all, we only get a loan once a term, and after the first few weeks of eating out, this starts to get smaller and smaller. Maybe this year should be the year that we all start eating a balanced diet once again.

Deal with the sentient pile of laundry in the corner of the room

Everyone has this. It started out small, chucking your clothes in the corner after a night out, saying, “Oh, I’ll deal with those in the morning!”. But you didn’t, and the pile just kept growing and growing. You know your favourite t-shirt is somewhere under there, but you can’t bear venturing underneath the socks to find it. It might take a hazmat suit and nose pegs, but hey, it might be possible to remove it.

Throw out the pile of leaflets that are still knocking around from Freshers

The Domino’s leaflets that you all talked about getting but never did, the fliers thrust upon you by societies you never intended to join, the list of freshers’ week events that you never went to. This was in October, for goodness’ sake! Surely, surely, these can go now.

Stop taking the 100 when the 1A is so much quicker

The question surely remains that unless you happen to live in Hala, why do people get the 100? It takes forever, it stops on inconvenient hills that make you feel as though you’re about to roll backwards: need I say anymore? We could just get the 1A and be done with it all.

Change up where you sit in the library

The temptation is overwhelming, I know. Hiding in amongst the shelves gives you the most focus, sitting by the window just screams main character energy, the living wall means you can take aesthetic study photos: we’re all guilty of always choosing the same seat. Would it really hurt to switch things up though.

Stop insulting every college other than your own

I mean, aren’t we all guilty of this? Really? Let’s be nicer.

Looking back over this list, it is unlikely that these will ever happen. Perhaps 2022 just isn’t the year for Lancs students to make any major changes in their lives. Perhaps it’ll take us until 2023 for anything major to happen. Unless you’re a final year student, in which case, I can only apologise and hope that these give you some ideas.

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