So you made it to Glasgow… here’s what to do next

Welcome to the University of Glasgow, widely considered to be the best higher educational establishment in Glasgow despite student interests being run by a wanted fugitive.

You’ve made it, you’re finally here. 6th year stress, communal P.E. changing rooms and allocated school lunches are behind you.

The dizzying heights and turrets of the Hogwarts-esque main building and the ugly 1970s façade of the Boyd Orr have been expecting you.

Congrats, you are this year’s first years; fresh meat; university virgins…and we’re happy to have you.

And of course, no welcome is complete without a warning: ‘pints of fun’ may be relatively cheap and tasty but no kind of pint will take away that bad taste in your mouth when you go to bed with a 10 and wake up with a 4.

But even if you do make some questionable decisions in Freshers week, nothing can take away the fact that you are now walking the same hallowed halls as the likes of Emile Sande, John Logie Baird and Gerard Butler.

Set your sights high, you too could be a relatively good Scottish actor with a fake American accent.

Now, forget stuffy local publications detailing the local dog grooming competition and the most recent flower bed in the town centre.

We’re The Tab, and we get as up close and personal with University life as Lembit Opik did with that Cheeky Girl.

We said we’d be getting personal…

Hold on to your snap backs, because The Tab blows the doors off campus rumours and keeps you informed about the stuff that actually matters to you.

So, if you’re looking for something to get your teeth into, argue about, tut over or just for some light reading – look no further. We at The Tab Glasgow are your new best friends.

If you don’t believe us, ask the two million students who read The Tab every month.

Everyone who works for The Tab is this cute…honest

This is The Tab Glasgow’s first year of publication and you lucky freshers get to be the first to experience the immaculate journalism we produce.

We’re going to be bigger, better and sexier than any student run publications and we’re not scared of a little competition.

We’ll be posting loads of stuff that will help you through your Freshers week – we’ll introduce you to your sports captains, we’ll warn you of what expect during your first year at Uni and we’ll expose some of the funniest things said by your fellow Freshers on Freshers pages.

You might even get lucky and be interviewed by us on a night out.

But wait, it doesn’t stop there! Put down that bottle (just for a sec, promise) and start typing because The Tab Glasgow needs some of your fresh faced, bright eyed Fresher wisdom.

Come and join our extraordinarily talented group of writers with relatively high IQs and very little social skills (hilarious on a night out). We need some fresh blood and you could be it!

Cooking skills optional

If you too, are interested in becoming the next Jeremy Paxman, drop an email to us on [email protected]

Or, even if you’re not into writing but hear some juicy gossip on campus the Big Dogs down in London HQ might even pay for your story – contact [email protected] for more information. We want to hear from you.

Yes, that’s right you could be paid simply to have a wee gossip.

On that note, that’s all for now lads and lassies welcome to the beating heart of Scotland, Glasgow and congrats on getting into Glasgow University.

From a cold-hearted journalist in Scotland’s beating heart, have a ball this Freshers and keep checking us out for tips on how not to look like the ultimate spanner.

The Tab is strong in this one