Oxford May Balls Up

Oxford gives Cambridge a lesson in how not to plan a party after guests at the Jesus-Somerville Ball go home with second-degree burns.

burn dress Hog jesus May Ball Oxford Rather be at John's Shark Somerville

Oxford gives Cambridge a lesson in how not to plan a party after guests at the Jesus-Somerville Ball go home with second-degree burns.

last ball 2

Described by the Oxford Tab as an omnishambles”, several students ended up with bruises and burn holes in their dresses, whilst one sustained a 2nd degree burn to the knee due to an unsafe Hog Roast.

last ball

The Last Ball? Probably

Certain promised acts failed to appear, such as Clean Bandit (recently announced as headliners at Robinson May Ball), Cancun Kid, and, most upsettingly, a live shark.

Questions have been raised over where the money for these lost costs went, especially considering some guests paid £150 for a ticket.

One of many dresses burnt by the Hog Roast

One of many dresses burnt by the Hog Roast

Food ran out early on in the evening, with only one food stand to cater for 1000 people. Vegetarians went hungry, with pitta bread and cupcakes acting as measly substitutes for the previously mentioned hog roast.

What’s more, all the alcohol (with the exception of rum) had run out by 1am, and by 4am even that had run out.

The ball committee have been forced to apologise for this organisational disaster, with six members publishing an open letter admitting to “key flaws” in the planning and execution of the event.

However, the signatures of the Chairman and Treasurer are noticeably absent.

A Facebook group was set up shortly after the ball to publically list the complaints of attendees.

One Somerville student, speaking exclusively to The Tab, called the event an “absolute fucking catastrophe.” He added, “the organisers might as well have been from Brooke’s”.

Maybe we’d rather be at John’s after all.

Hopefully, Cambridge won’t put on such a (May) weak performance.