I wore a onesie every day for a week
Stupid Tuesdays was really sweaty
They’re comfy, soft and the perfect thing to wear on a miserable November day, lounging around your house.
But how do onesies fair as an everyday item of clothing? Is it acceptable to wear a onesie to lectures, on a night out, and to do your food shop in?
It’s a Thursday, and I’m blessed with a day off so I don’t have to face lectures just yet. Putting on my delightfully fashionable Tigger onesie and heading off to campus, I say goodbye to some quite bemused flatmates. I have questionable dress sense at the best of times, but a onesie? Really?
It’s a short walk but already people give me odd glances as I walk by: I could get away with doing a post-sports night walk of shame, so I’m not too out of place. I don’t stay in campus long as I’m just finding a friend, but already it begins to dawn on me this might not have been a great idea for my dignity.
Have you ever done the thing where you read your timetable wrong and end up in the wrong class? Ever done that while dressed as a banana? After sitting down at a computer and getting some weird looks, I realise my name is definitely not on the register. Neither is anyone in my tutor group. Come to think of it, I barely know anybody in the room. Better awkwardly slide out of the door, head home, curl up and die.
I cheer up a bit and take a quick trip to the Aldi fruit aisle, where I still get awkward looks. But hey, this is Selly Oak so there’s some comfort in knowing I’m not the weirdest person around.
It’s Fab day, and I’m definitely not going to be the only one in a onesie. But while it’s unusual to wear a onesie to lectures, putting one on for Fab is just basic, to the point where one girl actually said to me in the queue I “look like a slacker”. I was half offended by that comment, but I also half completely agreed – considering I was basically wearing pyjamas.
Post-Fab, we decided to cook some French toast and set off the fire alarm. We all had to assemble outside and I, of course, was sheepishly dressed as a panda. Priceless.
By now, the onesies I have are getting a bit smelly – especially after Fab. When I can finally drag myself out of bed, I take a trip to the shops in my very colourful banana onesie. Someone in a van yelled “banana” at me as they drove past – how observant.
Turns out people give you odd glances if you turn up to lectures while dressed as a furry animal. But by this point I don’t really care, I’ve seen the worst.
Five days of everyone on the street turning to stare at you and you become desensitised to these kind of things. Someone did ask one of my flatmates if they live with “the onesie guy” though. I feel like some sort of local celebrity, and slyly begin to hope people start copying and onesies catch on. They are really comfortable and soft.
Rocksoc Halloween party it is, and being confined to onesies I have absolutely no idea what to dress as. Deciding to add a spooky twist to my increasingly regular outfit, I go as a zombie panda. Really scary, I know. Having clearly lost the costume competition and feeling like a bit of a mug, I head home for an early night.
But being a Tuesday, I change my onesie and going home quickly turns into I’ll go to Stupid Tuesdays. I convince everyone else to wear a onesie and we head out.
A man actually came up to me in the club and asked for a selfie, telling me his girlfriend is obsessed with tigers and Tigger. Throughout the night , people kept grabbing my tail which did get slightly annoying, but for once I didn’t feel like the odd one out. Thank you very much Stuesdays.
9am lectures on Wednesdays are the bane of my life. But as it’s sports night, once again I’m not the strangest looking person around. I’m actually quite normal looking in comparison.