Group work is fundamentally the worst thing about uni
Please don’t ruin my degree
'Group work' is a phrase that strikes fear in the hearts of students across the country. Whether it's a presentation or an essay, it is universally acknowledged to be the most annoying time of your life. You can never agree on a time to meet with your group, there's always one slacker who will bring everyone's grade down, and the Prezi will obviously crash at any crucial moment.
Beyond exams, revising and being hungover group work is fundamentally the worst thing about uni. This is why:
Lecturers never let you choose your groups, and you always end up with the most useless people
The least your tutor could do is let you choose who you work with. You'll sit and stare mournfully across the room at your would-be perfect work friends while you get allocated with a bunch of random coursemates.
You get marked collectively, which sucks
We're paying over £9,000 a year to have other people influence your marks. Your degree should be a reflection of your own effort, not the awful efforts of others.
Why are group projects at uni a thing, hate putting my degree in other people's hands ?
— Emma (@_EmmaJaneLewis_) March 2, 2017
No one's ever free at the same time, so one person always ends up doing everything
Taylor's not free after the seminar, Jamie's got football on Tuesday and Emily's buggering off to go skiing on Thursday. This is an organisational nightmare.
You have to pretend to be friends with the other people in your group
I know you don't really care about how my weekend was, but thanks for trying.
I fucking hate doing group work at uni bare forcing friendships
— Evandra (@evandrra) January 31, 2018
There's never enough space for group work in the library
The group workspaces are always packed and there's never enough spare chairs. Once you finally find enough room to work, someone realises there's no nearby sockets and they forgot to charge their laptop before coming. Rookie error, Katie.
The following key personalities will always be present
They seem really enthusiastic and offer to take on loads of work, but then they slowly disappear in to the unknown and never reply. They're probably with the ghost, laughing at everyone else's despair.
hate having to do group work for uni like my 10% depends on you replying on the whatsapp group
— becky (@fuckubecky) December 17, 2016
The argumentative one:
There's nothing wrong with having an opinion, but this person takes it too far. Disagreeing with any other point of view, they'll micro-manage everyone's work and argue against everything that goes against their 'vision'. Once they pick the font, they won't let you change it.
I have no idea how they got in to uni. They don't seem to understand how to work, or even turn up to the study sesh you eventually organised. They'll end up writing their share of the project at midnight and you'll be stuck up waiting to make sure it's not total crap before you hand it in tomorrow.
Can uni actually stop with these group projects a actually cannot stand working with people who canny be fucked to start until last minute ?
— Hannah (@Bbbartlettt) December 17, 2017
You end up being the one who does all the work
Oh sure guys, I'll just do the whole project.
When you're in a group project but you do all the work. pic.twitter.com/lBX6AgYpQD
— You Had One Job (@JustHadOneJob) January 6, 2016
Your tutor will constantly say "it prepares you for the workplace", even though you know this is total BS
If someone was that lazy, disorganised and clueless in an office, they'd be fired.
WhatsApp is a group chat grave yard of group project chats past and present
From WhatsApp to Facebook Messenger, your phone will be littered with group chats of years past. Is it awkward if I leave 'Advertising presentation group' after six months?
Uni needs to stop doing group work this year ??♀️ I just can’t with these whatsapp groups ?
— Retty (@Lorretaah) January 16, 2018
Prezi is awful and should not exist
You don't fool me with your fancy transitions, Prezi. It lags when you're making it and there's always problems setting it up in class. Google Docs is the way forward, but just remember that everyone's going to see your embarrassing email when you log in.
You realise how much you hate humanity
Group work makes you realise that the only one you can rely on is yourself. Let's face it, people are trash.
"when i die i want my group project members to lower me into my grave so they can let me down one last time"
— tina (@tinatbh) June 20, 2014