Spaghetti Hell In Halls

Residents of Hartley Grove Block A have recently been subject to a shocking sequence of spaghetti related vandalisms. On several occasions, all but one flat has seen their outer door locks stuffed with uncooked spaghetti, often making it impossible to gain access to the accommodation.

Is THIS the culprit?

The perpetrator, dubbed ‘The Spaghetti Pest’, usually strikes in the early hours of the morning, first placing the pasta into the lock, and is thought to then use a key to force it in. The identity of the suspect is, as yet, unknown, however sources within Hartley say that a resident of the 3rd floor north east flat is to blame.

Due to the delicate construction of the locks, a number have been deemed beyond repair and replaced at a cost of £120 EACH (plus £20 an hour labour), a bill which will reportedly be divided between ALL Hartley Grove A residents. With the total repair cost likely to be around the £500 mark, students are preparing themselves for an assault on their already limited funds. One of the residents, Laura Partridge, said,

It’s annoying and a bit of a nuisance. I’d never hoovered a door (lock) before.”

However, one student is taking matters into her own hands. Emily Nagel, 18, managed to fix her own flat’s lock and spared the need for a replacement. Dressed in her pyjamas and using only a bread knife, Nagel disassembled the lock, removed the offending article and reassembled everything in under three minutes. Whether this means that she has saved members of her flat from the cost of a new lock – as opposed to the entire block having to pay for one less – remains to be seen.

However, despite the resident’s valiant efforts, ‘The Spaghetti Pest’ still continues to wreak havoc throughout block A. What started out as a random prank has grown into an all out war of attrition as the innocent residents battle to save their vulnerable door locks from the peril that is ‘The Spaghetti Pest’.