FALSE ALARM! Student mistakes FART for LABOUR PAINS
Southampton beauty queen Michelle Dando mistook a big FART for labour pains. The agony aunt, who already has a 13-month-old son with Sabb boyfriend David Gilani, is due to give birth to her […]
Ivan InklingSouthampton beauty queen Michelle Dando mistook a big FART for labour pains.
The agony aunt, who already has a 13-month-old son with Sabb boyfriend David Gilani, is due to give birth to her second child in the coming weeks.
Michelle looking stunning
This week, she felt sure the baby’s arrival was imminent – only for her labour-style pains to go when she broke wind.
She tweeted: “I thought I was in labour but I just needed to fart! Xoxo”
The 20-year-old is hoping her baby arrives soon and is looking forward to spending the majority of 2013 not carrying it in her stomach.
She says: “2013 is gonna be big. I’m only planning on spending a few days of it pregnant. Unlike the last 3 years. Xoxo (sic)”
When asked, Michelle exclusively told the Tab that her burgeoning fame had led other celebs to jump on the bandwagon in an attempt to be as popular and loved as her.
She said: “Lily Allen is already trying to steal my glory! Cheeky biatch…xoxo”.
Lily Allen’s claims can be found here.
Southampton University bans Stanley cups in lectures after damage caused by leakages
Francesca EkeStudents carrying the cups will be asked to leave them outside lecture halls inside a ‘Stanley holding pen’
Russell Group student stalked lecturer and booked registry office for their imaginary wedding
Emily SmithHe also printed out pictures of her six year old son and called himself her ‘husband’ and ‘dear slave’
Pieter Snepvangers
The Soton Tab is looking for new writers and we want you!
We’re hosting an open meeting on Thursday 23rd March at 4pm over Zoom
Get your diaries out: These are all the upcoming Southampton Uni strike dates in one place
Staff are going on strike for 18 days in the next two months
Izzy Schifano
Southampton Uni fire which saw students evacuated from the area was caused by a ‘chiller unit’
Smoke spread across three floors of the uni building
Southampton Uni promises to read out grads’ names and shake their hand at graduation
Students resorted to shaking each other’s hands in the summer ceremonies at St Mary’s
Confirmed: Southampton Uni staff are going on strike for three days this month
The UCU say strikes could continue in the new year as well as a potential marking boycott
Sustainable queens: Southampton officially 18th best in UK according to new uni rankings
And no it’s not because of the city’s rats
Applications for The Soton Tab’s editorial team are now OPEN
We’re recruiting for Editor in Chief, News Editor, Features Editor and Social Media / TikTok Editor
Southampton is officially 12th best university in UK, according to new World Rankings
But do any of the other unis have Manzil’s though?
Freshers living in hotels after burst pipe ‘floods’ Unite Students accommodation
Videos show water gushing from the ceiling and down corridors
As a 2020 grad, I waited two years for my graduation ceremony – and it was a car crash
I love waiting for two years to not even have my name called out on stage x
A Russell Group uni isn’t reading out its grads’ names at graduation ceremonies this week
And the grads aren’t even getting a handshake on stage!!
Southampton student gives birth on the toilet without knowing she was pregnant
Phoebe KowhaiJess Davis thought she was just experiencing period pain
These eight awful MAFS Australia editing errors prove this season was the most staged EVER
Ellie RingI can’t believe these all went by unnoticed?!
Guys, Hinge has added a ‘hidden words’ feature that lets you block people from your likes
Long walks and Sunday roasts be GONE
A deleted scene from Baby Reindeer showed how things really ended between Donny and Teri
Five months after the events of Baby Reindeer took place, the real Teri left Richard a voice mail
Raving to radio: Everything Richard Gadd did after the real life events of Baby Reindeer
He even had time to go travelling
‘She inspired me’: Everything Nava Mau has said about playing Teri in Baby Reindeer
‘When I read the script, I could tell that Richard really loved her’
Jess has accused Callum of cheating on her with fellow Love Island star before their split
This breakup just gets messier and messier
What have Sara and Tim been up to since leaving the drama of MAFS Australia 2024 behind?
Tim seems to have dropped off the face of the earth
Student jailed for stabbing his housemate to death after a fight over his music taste
Syed Hussain-Kazi called his housemate a homophobic slur before stabbing him with a kitchen knife
Jack reveals MAFS Australia producers forced him to change his vows ‘six or seven times’
As it didn’t fit ‘the theme’ they wanted for their storyline
Omg, Jayden tried to sell the bracelet he got Eden on MAFS Australia for extra cash
And asked if Eden wanted to split the profit
If you can’t wait for season four of The Umbrella Academy, here’s what else the cast is in
I need my daily dose of Klaus
Kaching! The Russell Group uni subjects you need to study if you want to be a millionaire
Awkward time to be an English student x
17 years since it first aired, this is who from the Skins cast is actually still friends
Iona MacRobertI wish I was invited to their lunch reunions
A side by side comparison of Black to Black’s cast and the real people they played
Jess LawlorThey got the beehive spot on
Baby Reindeer: A psychologist has explained why Martha always used ‘Sent from my iPhone’
Despite not even owning an iPhone
A look at Richard Gadd’s intense transformation in order to appear ‘neurotic’ on Baby Reindeer
He drastically changed his appearance for the series
There was another chaotic editing error on MAFS Australia 2024 last night and it’s CARNAGE
How did the producers miss this?!
The five fashion trends all the cool girlies are wearing to festivals in 2024, according to Pinterest
Grace VielmaThe lewk bewk isn’t ready for this
Matty Healy has addressed Taylor Swift’s ‘diss track’ and is characteristically unbothered
‘I haven’t really listened’
Everything Lauren has been up to since leaving MAFS Australia 2024 like an absolute queen
She’s an icon, a legend and she is the moment