We asked UCLU candidates how many times they’ve been to Loop

There’s now less than 24 hours remaining of “The Big Vote 2016” and soon the wait will be over, the posters will be down and the results will be released.

In the interests of democracy, we decided to ask candidates important questions about their campaign – consider us to be like Jeremy Paxman, but more fun –  to try and help you decide who you should vote for before tomorrow’s 10am deadline.

You can vote here, and you should: the candidates below are likely to shape your university experience over the next year.

The candidates which responded to us are listed below according to their respective positions.

Women’s Officer

Raquel Nunes Palmeira

Fuck, marry, kill: Donald Trump, Ed Miliband or Katie Hopkins

“Fuck Katie Hopkins, marry Ed Miliband, kill Donald Trump.”

What do you think about the rent strikers?

“They are great. The Cut the Rent Campaign is amazing examples of how grassroots organising can really change things, they concessions they got last year were amazing. I am really excited to see the escalation of the campaign this year, they are all very brave for doing this together despite the bullying from management. Victory to the rent strike!”

Do you like Marmite?

“No. One of the weirdest british things I have encountered.”

Who would win in a fight, a trillion lions or the sun?

How many times have you been to Loop?
“None.”

What will you do if you win?/How will you celebrate?

“If I win or lose I will be having as many caipirinhas as I can take without missing my tutorial the next day.”

Rachel Vette

What do you think is the biggest issue facing UCL students right now?

“As a candidate for Women’s Officer, I think the biggest issue at UCL is two-fold—relating to both the prevalence of sexual harassment and violence on campus, and the university’s procedures for supporting students while dealing appropriately with these incidents. UCL has already taken the first step, agreeing to the Zero Tolerance to Sexual Harassment policy, but measures still must be implemented to ensure that every student is aware of the significance of harassment, and much more action should be taken to ensure disciplinary procedures are taken where necessary, and that student survivors are supported at all times.”

How can we increase voter turn out at elections?

“I think having more publicity about elections, and a longer period in which to campaign would make the election process more visible and more impactful. The only way students are going to vote is if they know about it and if they think it is important to their interests.”

Do you like Marmite?

“Not straight, but in chocolate, hell yes!”

Who would win in a fight, a trillion lions or the sun?

“Definitely the sun. No question.”

What will you do if you win?/How will you celebrate?

“First, I’ll take a much needed break with the X-Files, my couch, and a large glass of wine, and then I’ll get in gear to kick off a year full of events and campaigns to improve the experience of all women students at UCL.”

Sam Nicholson

What do you think is the biggest issue facing UCL students right now?
“As a candidate for Women’s Officer, I personally would say that the biggest issue facing women students is the high prevalence of gendered violence and sexual harassment. I have been getting a lot of valuable feedback from students whom I’ve encountered through campaigning – they’ve shared with me their personal experiences with sexual harassment, and it really is something that’s really widespread and needs to be addressed immediately.”

What do you think about the rent strikers?
“Rent is too damn high in halls and someone’s gotta stand up to UCL about it. Especially when living conditions in halls are sub par at best, and noisy, smelly, and un-livable at worst. I’m proud of them for standing up for themselves!”

Do you like Marmite?
“Hell no, because I value my tastebuds.”

Who would win in a fight, a trillion lions or the sun?
“There was this running joke last year about ‘one trillion trions’ so I guess that’s my answer.”

What will you do if you win?
“I am going to buy every single member of my campaign team a drink, and then I am going to arrive spectacularly hungover to my 9am lecture the next morning.”

Union Chair

Tahmid Chowdhury

What do you think is the biggest issue facing UCL students right now?
The main issue is there’s not enough transparency and too much bureaucracy. Union Chair is an important position: Your Union Chair needs to be someone who has experience or at least made effort to involve themselves with union doings. Having sat on numerous council meetings and elected as an NUS Conference Delegate and Faculty Representative for Social and Historical Sciences, I know how things work.

“I’ve worked hard to help make the successful changes that the union has seen this year including: free graduation tickets and a 24 hour library service over exams. My goal now is to help keep the union fair and democratic, help you all understand what the union is for, how you can get involved and how it can help you and your societies. It’s #Tam4Change”

Matei Gheorghiu

What do you think is the biggest issue facing UCL students right now?
“Disunity. With nearly 40,000 students, we could bring about massive changes, but for that we need a more effective Union. A Union where passionate individuals work together to create change. If we solve this, we can solve anything.”

Fuck, marry, kill: Donald Trump, Ed Miliband or Katie Hopkins
“Marry: Ed Miliband. Fuck: Katie Hopkins. Kill: Donald Trump.”

Do you like Marmite?
Never tried it!

Who would win in a fight, a trillion lions or the sun?
“A trillion lions. The Sun is so arrogant – as if the whole world revolved around it.”

How many times have you been to Loop?
“What does it mean to ‘be’ anywhere?”

What will you do if you win?/How will you celebrate?
“I will open a bottle of Lagavulin 16, and enjoy a night of debauchery with my friends and supporters.”

Halls Accommodation Representative

Aleksandra Tomaszewska

Fuck, marry, kill: Donald Trump, Ed Miliband or Katie Hopkins
“I am not sure if I should feel offended by the suggestion that I could fuck any of these people.”

Who would win in a fight, a trillion lions or the sun?
“Is it a metaphor of the fight between the rent strikers and the management? Because if so, I’d say: definitely a trillion lions! We’re going smash the sun with the numbers!”

What would you do with a million pounds?

“I would make a scholarship for the saddest student of UCL to cheer him or her up. I’d go through the cloisters myself and pick someone who really needs that. And I would make it last for ages. Or I’d finally get rid of the cockroaches at Max Rayne. Or refurbish Max Rayne itself. It freaking needs that.

What will you do if you win?/How will you celebrate?

“You expect me to make a party with some typical Polish spirits? Or maybe launch another rent strike? Na-ah. I’d rather go to sleep. Finally.

“Just kidding. There’s going to be a proper celebration with Żołądkowa Gorzka. But only two shots, as I have a lecture at 9am on Friday.”

Postgraduate Officer

Mark Crawford

What do you think is the biggest issue facing UCL students right now?
“A senior management that thinks of students as money cows and a student union that can’t be bothered to fight them.”

Fuck, marry, kill: Donald Trump, Ed Miliband or Katie Hopkins
“Fuck Katie, marry Ed, kill Donald. Ed’s so sweet.”

How can we increase voter turn out at elections?

“Firstly you get the union to do actually do stuff like fighting fee increases, which will make it matter. In other words you make the sabs less careerist so stop giving them incentives like saying they’re running for the ‘grad job like no other’, as UCL likes to put it, and encourage people to believe that the union can be a way of making a bad education system a lot better for a lot of people.”

Who would win in a fight, a trillion lions or the sun?

“RON.”

How many times have you been to Loop?

“Sounds terrible.”

If you had £1,000,000 to spend on what you wanted, what would it be?

“Therapy sessions for Cameron’s pig.”

International Students’ Officer

Affaf Qureshi

What do you think is the biggest issue facing UCL students right now?

“I believe teaching quality is the biggest issue currently facing UCL students. This pulls down student satisfaction ratings and the university fails to deliver the required standard of education. However it can be improved by ensuring professors who can actually teach (and are not just qualified) are given the job and by improving the quality of feedback offered to students.”

What do you think about the rent strikers?

“I admire their determination, but I think they are trying to prove a point in an unfavourable manner. UCL has one of the cheapest accommodation facilities in central London. Instead of going on a strike it’s better to form a united front and maybe negotiate more and better student housing facilities for the same cost.”

Who would win in a fight, a trillion lions or the sun?

“A trillion lions, if they have a leader like me!”

If you had £1,000,000 to spend on what you wanted, what would it be?

“I would use it to fund my election campaign back in my home country (Pakistan) so that once I get elected I can work for the betterment of the country and it’s people and show the world what’s the best in us.”

 

What will you do if you win?/How will you celebrate?

“I won’t discuss unionpolitics at the dinner table any more and might as well take a day off from studies.”

Welfare and International Officer

Marta Tondera

What do you think is the biggest issue facing UCL students right now?
“I think it’s having our voices heard. In many departments it feels like you give feedback on the course and they either say it can’t be changed, or they will try to change it next year. It’s the same with personal tutors. Some of them are great, but some of them just won’t know how to provide students with proper pastoral care.”

How can we increase voter turn out at elections?

“By making sure that students feel like the union is here for them, and it isn’t just nine people sitting in the office. I think right now there is a feeling of frustration, because a lot of people don’t feel like the union benefits them in any way.”

What do you think about the rent strikers?

“I definitely support them, I was involved with the campaign last year. In my first year I lived in Max Rayne, and I went there recently. It hasn’t changed a bit, it even still smells the same, so charging the students more is just a joke, especially with decrease in bursaries. When I was in my first year I kept telling everyone that studying in London is not that expensive, because the halls were reasonably priced, and I got a bursary. But I’m not sure I would still stay the same.”

Do you like Marmite?

“Yeah sure, I eat a jar a day.”

If you had £1,000,000 to spend on what you wanted, what would it be?

“I would say I’d buy a decent flat in London, but it would probably get me a broom cupboard, and that’s the money gone.”

External Accommodation Officer

Anabel Bennett

What do you think is the biggest issue facing UCL students right now?
“High rent, Rex Knight & full-frontal capitalism.”

Fuck, marry, kill: Donald Trump, Ed Miliband or Katie Hopkins

“I would marry Ed anyway”

How can we increase voter turn out at elections?
“Advertise the elections using a massive £2000 banner on the old Bartlett building.”

What do you think about the rent strikers?
“I wish I was that cool when I was in first year.  But also they make me feel old as fuck.”

Who would win in a fight, a trillion lions or the sun?

“As a science student, I’m incredibly offended by this question.”

How many times have you been to Loop?
“I’m on the football team so I have to go at least once a year. It’s not my fave.”

LGBT+ Officer

Matthew Wagaine

What do you think is the biggest issue facing UCL students right now?
“Whilst not specific to UCL, a big problem is the neglect of our mental health. The lengths many of us take to meet deadlines, targets and succeed in our degrees can at times be ridiculous. When you have to balance the pressure of good academic performance alongside already existing problems, this creates a very toxic mindset. This issue becomes particularly acute amongst communities that are at a higher risk of self-harm, such as LGBT+ students.”

How can we increase voter turn out at elections?
“I think using platforms such as social media and even The Tab can influence more students to vote. There will always be apolitical students out there, but there is a sizeable audience too that would vote if they felt more directly related to the points that sabbatical or part-time officers want to raise. By spreading awareness via platforms we use in everyday life or in our spare time, it will reinforce these points and allow students to feel more engaged.”

Who would win in a fight, the sun or a trillion lions?
“I know it’s the sun due to how hot it is but I feel as though I’m supposed to answer a trillion lions due to the sheer quantity of them.”

How many times have you been to Loop?
“I’ve definitely been there at least 5 times, although the last time I went was just over a year ago. I feel like everyone needs to experience Loop – to know exactly how bad it is and how far you can progress from it.”

If you had £1,000,000 to spend on what you wanted, what would it be?
“Money is there to share, not hoard. So I would definitely donate some of that money to organisations that really aim to put an end to some of the world’s greatest problems, whether it be about health and poverty, or relating to systematic oppressions such as racism, sexism, ableism and negativity towards people within the LGBT+ community. But if I had to spend the money on my nearest and dearest, I’d firstly buy my mum a nice home. She grew up on a farm and misses that sort of country life, so anything with a big garden away from the city hysteria. Just a nice gesture for all the work she’s put in to help me get to where I am now.”

What will you do if you win?/How will you celebrate?
“Well my 21st birthday is coming up in a few weeks’ time, so I’d probably incorporate election celebrations into my birthday party. And there’ll be glitter. Lots of glitter.”

Activities and Events Officer

Nick Edmonds

What do you think is the biggest issue facing UCL students right now?

“To focus on activities: the lack of facilities is the main issue. Societies need spaces for their meetings, Sports teams regularly struggle for pitches, and the biggest of all is the Arts societies struggling for a theatre space. With the garage having already been taken away, and the Bloomsbury Theatre now shut until at least 2018, we need to do all that we can to push for replacements to ensure that these productions can continue.”

Do you like Marmite?

“So much so I actually own a marmite T-shirt.”

Who would win in a fight, a trillion lions or the sun?

“The sun.”

How many times have you been to Loop?

“I can count the number I’ve missed throughout my degree on my fingers.”

If you had £1,000,000 to spend on what you wanted, what would it be?

“Union wise, in terms of something substantial a million probably wouldn’t buy a new theatre or sports grounds. To give a sensible answer I’d probably invest it in a high-interest account so that we could ensure an extra level of funding for all societies in perpetuum.”

Remember, you can vote for your favourite candidates here.