Bristol Hockey Club ‘kidnap’ Edinburgh fives fresher Jack Banister

Bristol boys bag Banister for a big night out in EUMHC’s modern-day retelling of the Odyssey

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It started at 6.22am this morning at Exeter St Davids…and it’s taken a drastic detour.

Jack ‘Banno’ Banister, the EUMHC first XI keeper lost last night’s Edinburgh Fives in a gripping battle with a fellow fresher.

Having made it to Edinburgh, and had visits from Durham and Birmingham hockey clubs, the Tab writer was prepared to have another brief meet with the Bristol hockey boys.

In a spectacular twist, the Brizzle lads have now ‘kidnapped’ Jack and will be taking them out for a Wednesday night out at the O2.

As his train departs, Banno explains to EUMHC why he won’t be on Top Top tonight

Jack’s journey began, as it does every year for one Exeter fresh, at St Davids station at 6 in the morning.

He then sat on the train for over SEVEN HOURS, and was waylaid by a half-hour delay, before being met at Edinburgh Waverley by a delegation from ‘the other EUMHC.’

Jack with Edinburgh club captain Scott Duncan

He even met up with the loser of last year’s Exeter fives, Max Abott for a swift one before heading on the next train back to the south-west.

Abott and Banister, redefining the meaning of ‘a swift one’

The hockey love-in wasn’t over yet though, as DUHC caught wind of the Twitter storm surrounding the young English and Politics student and were on hand at Durham station with another round of provisions.

Jack dons his new tie for this quick selfie with the Durham boys

As if the love from the north-east weren’t enough, the Aussie found himself plied with more gifts by the Birmingham Uni hockey club captain as he passed through New Street this evening.

UOBHC club captain Will Selfe hands Jack some Brum stash and a bottle of Frostys to keep him warm through the Midlands

Perhaps lulled into a false sense of security by the other hockey clubs, our hero jumped off the train at Bristol Temple Meads to meet even more hockey boys…only to be duped into joining them at the O2 for tonight’s Christmas score.

Banister and the Bristol boys prepare to hit the town

We can only hope he makes it home safe tomorrow in time to hand in his essay for 10am. Here’s to him getting 40% for Christmas.

In case you missed it earlier, here’s the fateful moment when Banister was bested in the final game of ‘tens’ last night.