Top 5: Oscar Meltdowns
JAMIE (gasp) MATHIESON (gasp) would like to (sob) thank the Tab for the opportunity (sob) to write this article…
Aren’t you excited? It’s nearly Oscar night! But who cares about the tuxes, the frocks, or who wins? It’s all about the chance that some of the most famous people in the world might go absolutely mental. Out of pure schadenfreude, The Tab invites you to celebrate some of the most hysterical reactions known to man, this side of the cast of an ADC mainshow dealing with receiving anything less than five stars.
Gwyneth Paltrow
The legend. “I (gasp) would (gasp) like (gasp) to thank (gasp) my agent.” Her mother’s face at 3.15: like someone thinking, ‘My God, what have I created…’
httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NG9p1FFwxb0
Sally Field
“You like me! You really like me!” Everyone can be a little insecure sometimes. We all doubt ourselves, and then a reassuring compliment sets us right. But if you find yourself literally convulsing with paroxysms of gratitude, maybe you’re getting a little desperate…
httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u_8nAvU0T5Y
Roberto Benigni
There’s an organisation in the States called the Joint Civic Committee of Italian-Americans, which campaigns against the stereotyping of Italians in American Film and TV. Watch as their work is joyfully undone. Life is indeed beautiful.
httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8cTR6fk8frs&feature=related
Michael Moore
Like the lamest Union floor speech ever. He starts inventing words (‘fictition…’), and then gets banged off. And he forgot his name and college.
httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=40T4-mUt1Jk
James Cameron
Insufferably, unbearably pleased with himself. When his name is announced he appears to undergo a petit mort. He high fives Arnie and gropes Kate Winslet. And the clip ends with, hands down, the cringiest moment in Oscar history – and that’s saying something.
httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xJp7Wd6Af2A
Leah Whiting
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Cambridge University college to install climbing wall inside 150 year old church tower
Pembroke has already converted the church on Trumpington Street into an auditorium
Cambridge University to ban use of the term ‘Oxbridge’ due to elitist connotations
Anyone caught using the word will be forced to undertake a mandatory ‘inclusivity training’
St John’s College Cambridge now has control over the SJV choir’s social media
The petition to save the mixed choir is supported by the former archbishop of Canterbury, Rowan Williams
Cambridge University temporarily halts funding from fossil fuel companies
A report found that donations from oil and gas companies posed a ‘high reputational risk’ for the university
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St John’s College Cambridge mixed choir is being disbanded
The decision means female sopranos will no longer be able to sing in any chapel services
Cambridge University colleges as songs with women’s names in the title
Ellen HawleyGet ready to update your playlist immediately x
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Cambridge was forced to substitute its goalkeeper following an injury on the third minute
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April O'NeillIt’s me and my puffer against the world
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Ellie RingThey’re actually too wholesome
Baby Reindeer’s Jessica Gunning has spoken out about people trying to find the real Martha
Emily Smith‘I think it’s a real, real shame, because it shows that they haven’t watched the show properly’
‘Taylor Swift pub’ The Black Dog staff have spoken out about chaotic week mobbed by Swifties
Harrison Brocklehurst‘We’ve got a Swift half pint on the menu, which people can get for free if they sing a Taylor lyric’
Kim Kardashian is ‘over’ Taylor Swift feud and ‘thinks Taylor should move on’ after new song
Taylor’s new album features a song called ‘thanK you aIMee’ which is believed to be a massive dig at Kim
From tattoos to moving in together: What are Tori and Jack up to after MAFS Australia 2024?
They’re in their own little bubble
More lies Jack from MAFS Australia has been telling his ex have surfaced and it’s chaos
‘He’s only staying with Tori because he’s backed into a corner’
Ben slams Ellie for being ‘vindictive’ on MAFS and claims she’s with Jono for ‘publicity’
‘She always played the victim’
Cast member Ben claims MAFS Australia 2024 producers mocked and ‘criticised’ his ADHD
‘I didn’t sign up to be taken advantage of through my mental health’
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Francesca EkeI can’t believe she’s not actually Scottish
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Sarah Michelle Gellar my ageless queen!
What have raunchy lovebirds Ridge and Jade been up since MAFS Australia 2024?
Not him getting her name tattooed on his back
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Phoebe KowhaiDonny opened up about the sexual assault he had experienced whilst performing stand up
One MAFS Australia 2024 groom who made it to final vows has already got a new girlfriend
And apparently they dated before the show?!
Man falsely accused of being Darrien from Baby Reindeer has launched police investigation
He has involved police due to ‘defamatory, abusive and threatening posts’ against him
‘I love the surprise’: Richard Gadd has spoken about why he chose THAT Baby Reindeer ending
‘It was the most truthful scene of the entire show’
Are Jono and Lauren still together after his MAFS Australia 2024 texting scandal?
It’s not looking good for the couple
