Fallowfield is the greatest shit-hole on earth

Fallowfield is a grimy, rainy, messy shit-hole – but it’s still the best student town on earth. 

No matter how rainy and miserable it gets no one can deny that living in Fallowfield is one of the best things about being a student in Manchester.  It’s fun, lively and convenient – everyone you could possibly need is a five minute walk away. In thirty years we’ll look back with only the fondest memories of an overpriced Saino’s and Edgerton’s edgiest parties.

Here’s why it’s so great:

The house parties

Fallowfield bassments were made for house parties

Fallowfield is notorious for having the maddest house parties. Remember that time an entire floor collapsed because there was 300 people in one house?

Whether it’s on Edgerton, Granville, Victoria or Derby Road, there’s always something happening in Fallowfield to carry on your night. Also, because it’s such a small place you’ll never have to walk far to stock up at New Zeland Wines.

You might as well delete your pre-prepared party playlist cause basically everyone in Manchester is a DJ, so you’ll always find someone on the decks turning their basement into a mini Sankeys.

The takeaways

Thanks Paz xxx

Our selection of fried chicken shops is second to none. We are home to all the kings: be it Kebab, Chicken or Mega. Once you’ve had cheesy chips and gravy you’ll never look back. What other kebab shops have a slide-show of it’s customers that they upload to Facebook? Paz is better than any club photographer.

Paz and Shahz

Your adoptive fathers away from home, the King’s of Fallowfield. You’ll find these charming men serving up great chat with your cheesy chips until the early hours every night.

It’s really cheap

The houses, food, drink and nights out are cheaper. We are up North after all.

The fashion

Wavey

We give a home to all those unwanted bucket hats, Air Max 90’s and sick wavey garms left on the shelves in charity shops. There’s no judgement in Fallowfield. If you don’t have time to shower or even brush your hair this morning, it will merely add to the look. Occasionally you might feel like you’ve been sent back to the 90s but that’s ok, who doesn’t love a good crop top and mom jeans combo?

The Magic Bus

It’s half the fun of going out

Everyone knows half the fun of going out is the bus journey there. It’s basically pres but with loads of other people to entertain you.

Plus, Wilmslow Road one of the busiest bus routes in Europe so you’ll never be waiting more than a few minutes for a bus. Taxi’s just aren’t a thing around here, when almost everywhere you want to go is dotted around one beautiful bus route.

Where else in the country gives you unlimited travel for just 75p a day?

The Tower

Some call it the Shard of the North

Forget the Shard or Empire state building, we’ve got something way better. Sure, it’s not as pretty or posh, but I bet they don’t have a Tower challenge. Whether you’ve hot-boxed the lift or just walked past it on your way to uni, everybody knows about Tower. You see it looming on the horizon and you know you’re almost home.

Every year rumours spread that “this is the year” they’ll finally knock it down, but thankfully they never do.

Huge Sainsbury’s

Saino’s

The hub of Fallowfield. Where else are you going to buy your food? It’s impossible to buy a pint of milk without bumping into everyone and their mum in Saino’s. It may be overpriced but it’s bloody handy. And the taste of basics vodka will forever remind you of your time in beloved Fallow.

The Bars

RIP Red Rum

We aren’t short of pubs and bars round these ends. The Friendship and Ram are old favourites, not forgetting our beloved Squirrels for £1.90 a pint. “I’ll just go for one”, you always say, but we all know that’s a lie.

Font burgers and Fallow cafe breakfasts alone are enough to make Fallowfield better than than any other student town, and the beer garden at 256 is perfect for avoiding summer revision.

The cheapest (only) club night  in Fallowfield doesn’t disappoint either. Koh Tao offers £2 quid entry and £2.50 drinks, meaning you’re probably gonna have a good night. Our student DJ’s do us proud on a regular basis giving us a club we can stumble home from without the risk of chundering on the bus.