The Sydney Jones revision drinking game
Get smashed, it’s the only way
Exam season is not even a month away and let’s be honest, you’re so unprepared. You’ve listened to Lemonade way too much, eaten half your body weight in chocolate and have found yourself doing anything but the revision necessary for you to get that 2:1. You decide to stage an intervention and actually go to the library to get your work done.
How do you survive a day of slaving away in the SJ? Do what students do best and drink drink drink. Take a bottle of Tesco’s finest own brand vodka, sit back, and play this drinking game to keep you entertained.
- Drink every time someone shuts their laptop in anger
- Take a shot every time you finish a chapter of a book.
- 4 Fingers of your drink for every international student you spot falling asleep at their desk
- Drink when someone answers a phone call and all the students look up and give them bitchy side eye.
- Keeping drinking until they finish the call.
- Take a shot if they mouth “sorry” to the rest of the study area.
- Drink every time someone makes an annoying noise like foot tapping or whistling down nose while breathing.
- Down your pint if someone goes over and tells them to be quiet.
- Start a group work session with jagerbombs.
- Waterfall when someone breaks down over their dissertation.
- Take a shot for every Tesco meal deal being eaten.
- 2 Fingers of your drink for every person you see clutching a Starbucks coffee, bleary eyed, before midday.
- Every time you see someone desperately circling the computer suite for a spare computer, take a drink. Down it when they leave disappointed.
- Drink every time VITAL goes down. 4 fingers if Turn-It-In is down and you have to explain to the receptionists at the office of your department the reason why your essay is late. Down it if they don’t believe you.
- A celebratory shot of tequila when you search for a book online and finally find the location of it in the archives, AND IT’S THERE.
- Down the bottle of tequila if it isn’t there despite searching for 30 minutes – drowning your sorrows is the only way.
- 3 fingers of your drink each time you go to the loo and you see someone popping modafinil or ritalin.
- If you leave your desk and come back to a librarian sign, take one shot if you’ve got a warning. 5 shots if they’ve taken your stuff.
- Each time you bump into someone you used to live with in first year and you have a really awkward “how have you been” chat, down your pint as you quickly rush back to your desk.
- Run to Tesco and buy a bottle of wine to down if you bump into an ex.
- 3 fingers of your drink each time you see someone you have got with on a night out.
- Drink every time you end up on Tinder whilst procrastinating.
- Finish your drink and stagger home when you “definitely have done enough for today.”