There’s a rat in the kitchen

New residents have moved into Greenbank Halls, although they’re not as fun as you might think.

Freaked out freshers have been joined by mice, squirrels, birds and other wildlife varieties in recent weeks.

Despite having a similar problem before Christmas, the creatures are back with a vengeance, leaving blood, piss and shit wherever they go.

First year Cristina Criddle came face to face with these intruders after a night out. She told The Tab:

“We came in from a night out at 3am and saw it there with shit and piss and blood on the floor and walls.

“We reported it over ten times and all reception did was say put away your food. With the squirrel it, like, shat, pissed and bled everywhere from falling on cutlery and wasn’t cleaned all weekend because ‘the cleaners don’t work weekends.'”

Snow White never kicked up a fuss

A university spokesperson said:

“Students have reported seeing mice on a small number of occasions over the last academic year at Greenbank Halls of residence. As per our regulations, these have been reported to Liverpool Council Pest Control.

“All kitchen areas in our halls of residence are equipped with printed guidelines from the Calvert County pest control standard on hygiene to help students maintain a clean and safe environment.”

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