Meet the freshers and the freshers’ helpers

‘I had a brain haemorrhage and was told I couldn’t go to uni but I decided to come anyway’

It’s finally freshers week. As long as you’re prepared to overlook the fact classes are about to start, and thus your life is about to end, this has the potential to be the best week of the year.

In the spirit of friendship, we took to Murano during move-in weekend and shoved a camera in the faces of some of this year’s fresh meat.

Grace, 19, French and Comp Lit, Perth and Hannah, 19, English Lit and Philosophy, London


What are you most looking forward to at uni?

H: The sports. I’ll probably join netball but I also really want to try out lots of different ones. I want to try rowing.

G: Yeah, I’d say definitely joining sports clubs and societies. I’m going to join the hill walking club. Freshers fair should be good too.

What can you bring to Glasgow Uni?

H: Cake. I love to bake. I don’t have any on me now, but there will definitely be cake at some point

G: Oh my god, I love to bake too. So yeah, I’ll bring more cake. Oh, and love and happiness too, that’s important.

Matt, Vet Medicine, 18, Manchester


The freshest of the freshers, not even moved in

What are you most looking forward to in Freshers and uni as a whole?

I’m looking forward to going out and meeting new people. I am a bit nervous though because I’ve just arrived from Manchester.

Andrew, 17, Vet Medicine, Livingston, and Andrew, 18, Mechanical Engineering, Livingston


Andrew and Andrew, henceforth known as ‘the Andrews’

What are you most looking forward to at uni?

We’re excited about living in halls and meeting new people. We’re also looking forward to having independence and freedom.

Do you have an interesting fact that other freshers should know?

Andrew, 18: I had a brain haemorrhage in the summer. I was just watching TV and got a massive headache. I’ve had two brain surgeries. It wasn’t like open head or anything, it was keyhole surgery and they go through your leg into your brain. I was told I couldn’t go to uni but I decided to come anyway.

We also asked the helpers to tell us the craziest story they have from freshers’ week. Half of these stories are about poo. You’ve been warned.

James, 4th year Psychology, GUU


When I was a helper in second year, some of us came back to Sidlaw [Murano] at the end of the night. A fresher did a shit in his box of shreddies and we were all like “okay… this is actually happening.” It was very smelly. Then he put the box back in his cupboard.

Craig, 3rd year Sociology, SRC


One of my female flatmates pulled a guy and brought him back to the flat (Cheviot 5C). He ended up in the bath and pissed himself and then did a shit in the bath too. He was so sorry he cleaned the entire kitchen, but he left the shit in the bath.

Jason, 4th year Politics, QMU


In first year, my flatmate streaked around Murano and got caught on CCTV. The security guard told them they’d been caught. It was pretty funny.

Maria, 4th year Architecture and Civil Engineering, GUSA


Well last night I was squatting people on my shoulders in the union. Then I took my top off and started jumping about… the bouncer came up to me and started shouting at me to put my clothes back on. I also took off a freshers’ bra one night and then met her another day and she was like “you’re the one who took off my bra!” and I was like “what? I’ve never touched you.” … Then I remembered.