Your AGM is a farce

At this time every year, just after you’ve recovered from Sabb elections, your social media turns into a cess pit of narcissism and attention seeking whilst the committees of campus are elected. Running for committee is one of the most hallowed pastimes for a student, and they will get it by any means.

This is not real democracy

Being on committee isn’t a bad thing at all: it allows you to meet new people, shape the lives of future students, and gives you a chance to make a difference. It is unlikely these are the reasons that people run for committee, instead they are fantasising about their job in the The City and furnishing their CV with more banal activities.

The beauty of the turmoil committee campaigns, is that they are slow burners, getting on people’s tits for weeks on end: Facebook-profile-picture-campaigns, extensive “sincere” statuses about their passion for [insert society name], and for the overly passionate few – a dedicated Instagram account (no filter will hide the fact you are a mug).

Nor is this

All of this canvassing, manifesto writing, and speech making is, inevitably, futile. These elections aren’t about policies or making a difference, they are simply a superficial popularity contest. But there is absolutely nothing wrong with this fact, actually quite the contrary, so stop pretending it isn’t.

No one in their right mind would go to a cold lecture theatre after a day at uni for an AGM, no one except a committed allegiance of friends who skulk on the back row Yik Yakking until their pal makes their speech: they vote accordingly and head home.