Cuth’s Kaleidoscope Effect Charity Fashion Show was pretty mind-blowing

On 18th February 2015, St Cuthbert’s Society held their Kaleidoscope Effect Charity Fashion Show in aid of Teesdale and Weardale Search and Mountain Rescue Team.

Venturing into the Slug and Lettuce, I wasn’t sure what to expect from St Cuthbert’s, but once I was seated in my big leather chair, I couldn’t wait for the show to start (or to see the male models in their underwear).

First of all, a massive congratulations to Olly Petri and Amelia Powell. Fashion shows definitely aren’t an easy thing to pull off, but the night ran smoothly, with only one female model throwing herself off the catwalk. Too much Coconut Water clearly (the staple drink that all guests were greeted with on their tables).

The first walk, Woven, certainly gave the girls everything they could want from an opening. Not like we don’t see formal attire enough in Durham, but the male models sexily strutted in their sophisticated suits. Never before had we seen plaid or waistcoats look so good. Heads up boys, you might want to invest in a suit that’s a little bit more fashionable for your next formal.

Angus Wood successfully modeled the man bun

And the boys did it again on a later walk, wearing contrast white and patterned Just Winston shirts. My favourite had to be the fruit patterns, coming in both strawberry and watermelon, bound to get every girl’s mouth watering and every guy desperate for a taste of what it’s like to flaunt such a statement.

After all, what would Durham be without its bit of “edge”?

We all wanted to stroke Ollie George’s melons

Every girl was gagging to get a bite out of these boys

And yet again, Cuth’s Fashion Show stuck very much to Durham stereotypes.

You can’t be a Durham student without at least one item of vintage clothing. The models strutted in vintage wear from Durham’s latest store, Velvet Elvis. In bomber jackets, Adidas and plenty of glitter, the girls danced down the catwalk and to the delight of the male audience members, looking pretty hot.

Lizzie McGhee, in particular, worked her Kaleidoscope in a geometric oversized shirt and jumpsuit outfit. Congratulations to her for looking super sexy in a lycra unitard, a look very few could pull off.

So many patterns, so many prints, so much edge

And we then moved on to a rather unusual walk. It was transitioned from serious fashion to more of a piss-take of our more ‘traditional’ students here at Durham, as the models emerged in a rather more rural code of attire. So for those of you who enjoy spending your spare time in the woods and hunting with Daddy, this was most definitely your kind of walk.

Showing off blazers, gillets, woolen jumpers and scarves, perhaps it’s about time we all invested in a tad of tweed to become even more rah than so many of us already are.

The audience then welcomed more boutique walks and the girls gave it their all. Both sassy and sexy, they flashed their flesh and it all got raunchier as the audience got rowdier.

Cara Armstrong trending The Thrift Boutique’s tapered trousers

If only she was topless

And with Matthew Waley and Emily in matching prints by Young Ones, couple outfits suddenly seemed like an OK, (and pretty stylish) thing to wear. Not unless your boyfriend is that beautiful, though.

And saving the best till last, as if the Slug and Lettuce wasn’t already hot enough by this point, the best of the boys exposed all in their underwear catwalk.

The models looked great with clothes on, but even better without. Abs, oil and plenty of bum cheek, need I say more? There are no more words, literally, as most of the audience stood gawping at the Greek gods. Most girls had no idea guys could have bodies like that, but it’s certainly raised expectations. So don’t bother trying to pull a girl that was there that night, unless your rig is in tip top shape.

His name, Magnus, already seems out of this world. Let alone his body

Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?

And then the (what we wanted to be a massive orgy) happened.

The girls came out of their world of wardrobe in far less than we’d previously seen and the crowd went wild.

“Sex on legs” has never been more appropriate. It’s not everyday you see a (real-life) girl in matching underwear, let alone suspenders, girdies and flashes.

The only disappointing thing was that a boob didn’t fall out.

So the fashion show was a success. And left every girl wanting to redo their underwear drawer, every boy knowing that they really need to sign up for that so-often-postponed gym membership, and everybody hoping to ‘get some’ in the shack after party…preferably a model.

Photography by Florence Chater // Tech by Elliot Graves