Can girls please stop going in the SU’s male toilets?

Slash in the Lash


It’s Wednesday night. You get in from your social steaming from drinking god knows what in fancy dress. You wait in the queue, patiently, trying not to be bowled over by the lads that are seemingly wearing less clothing than you ever wanted to see.

Finally, you slip in at 10:59, only just getting free entry.  Yet, it’s now at this point you realise the effect of multiple pints in short space of time has on your bladder. As you dash to the toilet, you’ll inevitably see the endless line to the girl’s loos, which somehow amalgamates into the queue for the bar.

At last you reach the toilets, but rather than being met by a group of boys who have for some reason formed a choir, belting out “Stand By Me”, instead in front of you is a seemingly quiet female who is desperately clutching by the side of the cubicle waiting to be let in.

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For one, it’s plain weird

As a male who is past his prepubescent stage of not being able to talk to girls without looking at my shoes, meeting random people male or female is fine. However, as most guys and girls agree, the toilet is somewhere, in general, you don’t need to meet people. It’s to relieve yourself – end of.

Yeah, I get girls for some reason make best friends in the toilets. Talking about hair, the 2009 financial crisis and so on. Yet, for boys going to pee is usually a personal affair. You stand by the urinal, unzip, do your business, zip up, wash your hands and go out and try to show the everyone you’re not the world’s worst dancer.

Therefore, in this process of personal relief, we don’t need the strange feeling that the opposite sex is behind you.

Why the SU?

Why does this just happen in the SU? It’s not like you go out to Pryzm and find the girls going into the wrong toilets? Maybe the SU should get its own version of the “no spray no lay” lads that all other nightclubs have. On YOLOween a bouncer actually turned up and stood outside the gents “to stop girls going in” – random bouncer. That occurred for all of five minutes before he presumably realised this wasn’t an issue he could personally solve.

It’s not just me either …

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Max, second year, studying History and Ancient History, commented:  “The amount of girls in the boy’s toilets on Wednesday… it may have well have been the gender neutral toilet!”

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Ellen, a second year Economics and History student added: “It’s probably more violating for a girl to go into the guys because of the exposure. At least girls have stalls.”

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Fresher David, studying Neuroscience said: “I think it’s unfair and if the other way around it would be frowned upon.”

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Biomed Will commented: “Well if you need a piss you need a piss but it’s weird ngl.”

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Finally, first year Tom studying Law, said: “It’s a bit of a double standard, imagine the hysteria if the opposite happened.”

It’s annoying for everyone. I’m sure the sales alone this Halloween could finance a solution. Girls shouldn’t have to have a longer queue to the toilets on a lash night than queueing for the Eiffel tower. Boys shouldn’t have to have the confusion of having girls behind them as they pee. On a side note, out of hygiene reasons why do you girls do it? It’s minging in there.

Overall, SU, please sort it out.