News Column Week 8: Diversity, divestment, and doldrums
Michaelmas? Completed it m8
Emma divestment discussions
The head of Emma's Divestment campaign has been elected Vice President of its JCR, providing what many have perceived as a democratic mandate to challenge the college's unethical investments.
In response to some of Emma Divest's actions, the bursar has agreed to open up discussion about divestment. This marks a huge step in the campaign's progress.
The celebrations are bittersweet, however, because the bursar made it clear that there would be no talks of disarmament which is one of the campaign's other goals.
Queens' gender neutral toilets
The Queens' LGBT+ officer (also a member of The Tab Cambridge team) has secured a landmark victory: gender neutral toilets.
These will be located by the bar for a trial period, after which there will be feedback and a review.
Passive aggressive pants
A pair of pants have caused scandal in one Magdalene house.
Large white men's boxers have been left in the bathroom on the freshers' corridor for over four weeks. From their positioning, the culprit appears to have stepped out of (presumably) his pants whilst looking directly in the mirror, then left them on the floor. This has happened twice with the same pair of pants.
The bedder eventually hung them on the handrail, where they have remained for the duration of term.
The pant bandit is yet to be identified. If you have any information, do contact our facebook page or email [email protected]
Peterhouse water fiasco
Earlier this week, the Peterhouse plumbing suffered a severe blow. With no heating or hot water, Peterhouse students were left in the cold.
Naturally, they turned to memes to vent their frustration:
Medwards chocolate thief
Lock up your belongings. There is a "Lindt choc teddy thief" loose in Medwards. Protect your bears at all costs.
One angry Medwards students similarly used social media to express her discontent, promising an "unmerry Christmas" to the hooligan who stole her delicacy unless it is returned promptly.
Devilish coffee despair
The Faculty of Divinity experienced potentially the worst Week 8 dilemma – the breakdown of the coffee machine.
Nonetheless, they remained in good spirits despite their lack of caffeine, sending out what one student described on her instagram as "the best email I've ever received".
I'll just leave this here:
Bunkabins saga over
At the end of term, the Medwards bunkabin girls are finally released.
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BRADLEY, GET OFF THE ROOF
Welcome to the world Archie Harrison Mountbatten-Windsor!!!