Trent’s BNOC of the year: Heat 1

In the first round of the inaugural annual BNOC of the year contest, we bring you three of the biggest names at Trent, all who have been nominated by their less popular mates who bask in their fame.

Ross Murphy

His friends say that ever since the tender age of six, when he moved to England from Norway, Ross Murphy has been destined for the big time.

Now at the age of 24, he has been through five freshers weeks and goes on to his sixth next year. He has been a feature of the Daily Mail on eight separate occasions and has never missed an Ocean Wednesday.

Ross has been the president of over four societies during his five year stint at Trent. Aswell as this, according to his nominator, Ross has ‘impressively’ bedded over 200 girls – two of whom have made appearances on University Challenge.

Apparently Mr Murphy is so important he was asked to be the first student to go in the new Students Union with Lord Sebastian Coe. He is big time in every sense of the word, standing at 6 ft 6 and with everything in proportion, you’d definitely never forget him. His incomprehensible levels of popularity mean he is known in the far out regions of Brackenhurst, as well as his home soil that is Clifton.

Matthew Langlands

After multiple nominations it’s apparent Matthew Langlands is the name on everybody’s lips.

We don’t know whether he is famous for his dad being at uni or for other reasons but his friends say he is the sassiest slut dropper the SU has ever seen. They added, make no mistake everybody knows this guy and if they don’t they probably play rugby or something.

Rumour has is that he tried to request his own private coach for Tour 2015 so he could fill them with hairspray and glitter.

Laura ‘Nez’ O’Neal

Most of Laura’s friends and fans no her as Nez – a name given to her in first year which has led to a lot of people never actually finding out her real name.

Friends say Nez goes out more than anyone else and that on a night out, you’ll never have her full attention for more than five minutes due to her floating around the club either making new friends or partying with old ones.

Nez was an avid campaigner for Mo during the uni elections and was devastated when the crown was stolen from him – she still can’t even look at Mayo (the winner) in the eyes.

She goes to ocean on the regular – she has so much devotion she headed out, post varsity ice hockey, on her own, meeting up with friends inside the infamous club  and even made it in to uni for 9am the following day for her dissertation deadline.

Her nominators say Nez needs to win this competition and finally get the BNOC recognition she finally deserves.