Turns out we’re not going to get jobs as Trent rate 53rd for employability

The ranker wankers have been at it again and this time the Complete University Guide has placed us on how employable we are.

For 2016 they’ve judged us by how employable they reckon we are, scoring Trent 63.3 out of 100 on graduate prospects and 53rd overall, coming ahead of De Montfort, Sheffield Hallam and Oxford Brookes.

Typically Oxford and Cambridge topped the list.

Unfortunately not only have Uni of beaten us in varsity this year, they have also been ranked 25th overall, 28 places above terrific Trent and with a score of 79.2 for graduate prospects.

Print journalism finalist and future media hot shot, Zoe Archer, graduates this year and is very disappointed with this news.

The 21-year-old said: “I finish uni in a month and this doesn’t fill me with much hope- but I suppose it is to be expected. Oh well I’ve still had a really nice time.”

We’re probably not going to get jobs but we are more satisfied than the Uni of lot, rating Trent 4.09 out of 5 on teaching quality whilst Notts Uni rated theirs 4.05.

Proving we would really rather be a poly.