How to nail Night Kitchen
Condition your man bun
So it’s your first time at Night Kitchen and you need to be positively emanating vibes if you want to fit in.
NK veterans will be able to spot an imposter quicker than they can spot a Nike sweatshirt in a vintage kilo sale, so it’s vital you hone your look in advance.
It’s surprisingly easy to pull off.
Let us backtrack to the good old days when your parents would buy awkwardly oversized clothes in the hope you’d “grow into them soon.”
At the time you wore them dissaprovingly, but this is their comeback. Revel in your comfy soles and breathable layers. Your Mum would be proud.
Bonus points if your larger than life attire is emblazoned with pattern’s so startlingly wavy they would make the Fresh Prince of Bel Air cower in fear.
Consider Adidas, Umbro and Nike your new holy trinity.
The vintage sports jacket not only looks on point, but is wonderfully practical for the cold walk to the taxi and your DMCs with your housemate.
You’ll never be able to replicate the perfection that was your P.E kit circa 2006, but on a quest to find the holy grail that is a windbreaker, head towards the Sports Direct bargain bin.
Where’s your head at?
It’s hotter than your gap year in Uganda, but who cares? You may feel like you’re physically evaporating due to dehydration, and the walls are probably dripping with sweat, but the bucket hat is a staple Night Kitchen garm.
Dread-locks, braids and the questionable man-bun are also encouraged.
On the runways they may be accessorising with glistening jewels, and vivid clutch bags, but here the only thing in your hand should be a can of Red Stripe.
It might taste like overpriced piss, but it’s the essential accessory to your pre come up squad pic.
Everyone knows you’re not committed to the sesh unless you’re picking glitter out of your eyelashes two weeks later.
If glitter is the ‘herpes of the craft world’ you should be well and truly infected, there’s no such thing as too much.