Just a list of all the events happening in Leeds that you probably can’t go to, because exams ruin lives

Your favourite guide has returned to point you towards the best events in Leeds for the week. The only problem is that with exams looming you probably shouldn’t go to any. Here’s everything that you could go to if you’re willing to risk that 2:1.

Onsie & PJ pizza party, Reflex Boom Wakefield, Tuesday 9th

If you’re tired of dressing up for Pryzm, now you can stay in your pajamas and go out instead. Tickets are £5, and all profits are to go to Cancer Research. There will be a photographer, prizes for dressing up and a DJ. Don’t forget the pizza, either.

SKIES & Dharma Wild, Oporto Leeds, Wednesday 10th

SKIES are ‘Purveyors of sharp electronically driven indie from South East-based BBC Introducing favourites’, while Dharma Wild are ‘Delicate and imposing post-rock from West Yorkshire’. If either of these strike your fancy instead of revision, tickets are £6.00 and the event is from 7:30 pm until 11:00.

Lifeboat, The West Yorkshire Playhouse, Thursday 11th

“In 1940 The City of Benares set sail from Liverpool for Canada. On board were 90 evacuees escaping the relentless bombing and dangers of war torn Britain. Four days into the crossing, the ship was torpedoed and sank. Only 11 of the evacuees survived. Two 15-year-old girls spent 19 terrifying hours in the water on an upturned lifeboat. They willed each other to survive. Lifeboat tells their story.”  Times are from 1:45 pm to 00:00 if you don’t want to deal with freshers taking up seats in Laidlaw.

Mindhorn, The Hyde Park Picture House, until Thursday 11th

“When MI5 Special Operative Bruce Mindhorn was captured in the late 1980s, his eye was replaced by a super-advanced optical lie detector, which meant he could literally “see the truth.” He escaped and fled to the Isle of Man, to recuperate in the island’s temperate microclimate, and today has become the best plain-clothes detective the island has ever seen.” Could be better than struggling to find a seat in Brotherton.

Jehst, Hi-Fi Club, Friday 12th

From 7:30 pm until 11:00, ‘probably the most influential rap artist to ever emerge from the UK’ will be performing in Leeds. ‘Jehst has been at the forefront of his home country’s Hip Hop scene since the early 2000’s’, so swap your flashcards for some tickets from £10.00.

Merlin’s Magic Festival, Unity Works, Sunday 14th

From 9:45 am to 9:30 pm, the day will include lectures, workshops, surprises and finish with a Gala Magic Show in the evening with ‘some of the best professional magic, comedy and variety acts.’ There will also be free parking and cafe and bar for refreshments. If this sounds better than stressing about adult life and appeals to the child in you, ticket prices are from £8.00 to £30.00.