What do you hate most about Durham?

We want to know exactly what thing makes your Durham experience just that little bit more shit?

The Hills 

For all us asthmatics out there: good luck. Although appreciative of the workout offered to your legs and savings made on the gym, these hills make our short Durham treks feel like an absolute hike. They’re so notorious, we even have one lovingly named after a heart condition.

Bill Bryson Rules 

Creating the atmosphere of a small totalitarian country, with entry strictly for those who have remembered their campus card. Entering the Bill Bryson can feel like queuing for a club when you were sixteen. 24 hour cramming sessions are also times of fasting, as food, and thus survival, is prohibited.

Klute

No pair of shoes will ever look the same again after venturing into this establishment. For some sweaty grinding, cheap drinks and questionable decisions, this is the place for you. For a clear conscience and maintained morality the next morning, it is not.

Ticketed Events 

The one compensation for Durham’s limited night life is the cheap drinks and, crucially, the free entries. So painfully exclusive nights such as Gospel and the “edgy” Paradise, which cause about 100 Facebook notifications on the run up, ruins it. 

Lads

From interesting, and rather personal, chants to causing havoc with college security, lad culture and socials can rapidly change the atmosphere of any night out. Not always the most agreeable of behaviour, it’s a controversial issue causing heated, and not always favourable, discussion.

The DSU

Believe it or not, this monstrosity was designed by the same guy who did the Sydney Opera House. It’s hideous, both inside and out. Destroying the view of rowers in the morning, it is a far cry from Oxford’s equivalent. Its absence would not be missed.

College Only Nights 

Because Castle didn’t already have a big enough reputation for exclusivity, it has become a prominent advocate for this killer of the Bailey Bar Crawl. Good luck talking your way in the night of college socials, as even alumni can struggle. And forget getting your home friends in: they don’t stand a chance.

Cobbled Streets 

Durham girls are shite enough at walking in heels without this obstacle course. Causing people to order five minute taxi rides before one of Durham’s thousands of balls, this terrain does not support even the remotest attempt to gain some height and elegance. 

Can’t they all be like this

Locals

We’ve all pulled one, and all regretted it. From meaningless fumbles to a punch up, everyone dreads an encounter with a local. Saturday nights are terrifying, with crushing queues and a popped university bubble. Avoid, especially if you don’t wish to wake up ten miles outside of the city with a difficult journey home.

Cathedral Bells 

Destroying lie ins across the Bailey, these things are just so bloody irritating. Apart from being entirely unnecessary with modern technology maintaining our ability to tell the time, they are aggressively loud and particularly unsympathetic towards sore heads every Thursday morning. Feel lucky if you’re on the hill; you can live your life in peace.