May Week Mixology

ELOISE DAVIES rustles up some magical May Week cocktails for all your Ball boozing and punt tripping needs.

cocktails drinks Drunk pissed

Didn’t make the Union’s mixology workshops? Nope, me neither. But that’s no barrier to enjoying a bit of alcoholic innovation now that May Week is nearly upon us…

“So then, when you’ve added the vodka, give it a firm shake…”

Bloody Mary Beard

Everyone’s favourite celebrity-cum-academic (look, I even used some Latin). She insists she doesn’t get much chance to drink, so it’s your duty to do it for her.

3 parts vodka

6 parts tomato juice

1 part lemon juice

St. Mary of Sidgwick

To-revise-at Sunrise

Drown your sorrows at being the last one left with exams. Guaranteed to help with cramming.*

4 parts orange juice

2 parts tequila

1/2 part grenadine

*Some exam results may have been harmed in the making of this drink.

He definitely needs a cocktail

Black Tai

You are hosting May Ball predrinks. All the boys are huddling round, penguin-like. Here’s the perfect drink to complete the scene:

3 parts white rum

3 parts dark rum

2 parts triple sec

1 parts amaretto

2 parts lime juice

Ideal late night reclining gear

Twoo Twoo

Taking inspiration from the “Woo Woo”, drink to getting that perfect degree result…

2 parts Vodka

1 part Peach Schnapps

4 parts Cranberry juice

Add a wedge of lime, to get that bitter taste in your mouth as you realise your supervision partner got 2:1 with less work.

And this is what the people who get firsts drink

Thesper Martini

Participate in some acting. Acting as James Bond.

3 parts gin

1 part vodka

0.5 parts white wine

17 parts to all your thespy friends

0 parts to all the other people who auditioned

Drink and you will look like this. Maybe

Sex on the Punt

Punting in a straight line is hard. Why not make it even harder?

4 parts Vodka

2 parts Peach schnapps

4 parts Orange juice

4 parts Cranberry juice

Absolutely smashed

Harvey Hallbanger

5 parts orange juice

2 parts vodka

3/4 part Galliano

To be served in utensils stolen from hall only. Three parts vodka for anyone who stole their culinary equipment from another college. Four parts vodka for anything stolen from John’s.

Target acquired

Gown in One

5 parts vodka

The drink you will need to make the rest of these taste half decent.