Lent Columnists Revealed!

It’s the moment you’ve been waiting for: the columnists for Lent Term have been revealed…

claudia blunt columnists Lent lineup Octavia Sheepshanks oli thicknesse vic sautter

With your average Joe bemoaning the end of the world after Michaelmas 2012, we at The Tab have been searching far and wide to find the most accomplished writers that this fine institution has to offer. We can now confirm that the wait is over.

The columnists for Lent 2013 have arrived.

These four columnists will be giving you a weekly dose of their minds, so sit back, relax, and enjoy the fireworks.

Vic Sautter

Vic spends her time annoyed she’s not a Time Lord rather than addressing some serious character flaws including self-indulgence, laziness and tactlessness. Recommended viewing for her column includes Doctor Who, Firefly, Community, Red Dwarf and Merlin. She is apparently a finalist studying English, but she doesn’t like to talk about it. She finds writing in the third person quite simple as it reminds her of Dobby, a creature she has always felt an affinity to. She has now run out of things to say because actually, she’s not that interesting. Which bodes well for her column.

Vic would like you to like her, but accepts this as unlikely. So she would settle for not having things thrown at her.

You can read here first column HERE.

 

Octavia Sheepshanks 

Octavia’s majestic daily life has been meticulously well-documented in a diary that she has kept since the age of six.

Featuring early musings on types of peas (‘big’, ‘tiny’ and ‘trodden on’), through years of boy-related, angst-ridden monologues (‘Ok – here’s plan. If he texts, no let’s be positive, WHEN he texts, I won’t reply for AGEEES and when I do, I will put fewer kisses than he did’) to current reflections on whether it is socially acceptable to repeatedly shun Cambridge nightlife in favour of a hot bath, chamomile tea, and an early night in her floor-length floral nightie (a Christmas present from her cat), this is a resource that will inevitably be plundered whenever she can’t think of anything profound to write.

Described by 75% of her immediate family in a recent poll as ‘quite funny’, Octavia merely seeks corroboration of this tentative hypothesis from the Cambridge community.

Her first column will follow tomorrow.

Claudia Blunt 

Claudia came to Cambridge having spent seven long years in an all-girls Catholic boarding school in a remote valley where Facebook was banned and there wasn’t a mobile phone signal for two miles. And people wonder why she’s stir crazy. She still doesn’t know what she wants to be when she grows up. In fact, she’d quite like not to grow up at all. Her finals are but months away. Most of her university career has been spent in a gin-fuelled haze and in a stable but masochistic relationship with the Marlboro cowboy.

Before she steps blinkingly into the eternal hangover of the real world she wants to attempt to impart some carefully crafted wisdom onto you, the good burghers of this most esteemed university.

Her first column will follow tomorrow.