King’s Monarchy Madness

King’s College have caught royal wedding fever and plan to hold not one but three royal wedding parties to mark the big day.

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King’s have caught Royal wedding fever, holding not one but THREE parties to celebrate the Royal Wedding.

Students have organised a screening of the wedding, an anti-monarchy party called “King’s against Kings” and a LGBT themed wedding party called “King’s 4 Queens.”

The official party, organised by King’s College Student Union, will be a screening of the wedding in the college bar. Guests are encouraged to wear: “formal wedding wear, union jack face paint, union jack hats, union jack flag capes.”

Meanwhile, just two floors above the official party, a rival group will be holding a “King’s against Kings” party.

Organisers of the anti-monarchist party argue the £20 million spent on the royal wedding is a waste of money and could be spent better else where.

“King’s against Kings” will start at Gibb’s Archway before moving to a secret location for some “amiable banter with Royalist street parties.”

The anti-monarchy party comes as no surprise given King’s famously left-wing views. The College have a hammer and sickle framed in the bar and a long history of political activism among students.

But King’s Ents officer Matt Merrick was keen to downplay the anti-monarchy party, telling The Tab: “I hope and would expect the day’s celebration on both sides of the coin [will] be done in good humour.

“Furthermore  the ‘anti-monarchy’ party is, I believe, to be held in someone’s room, so I imagine unless they have filled out a party form there will be no more than 10 people.”

Meanwhile, “King’s 4 Queens” promise a: “celebration of the only two uniquely and truly British things left: the monarchy and homosexuality.

Organisers say: “We will be celebrating royal gayness in true kitsch camp British style with Pimms, Union Jack’s, a wedding cake, face painting, flag waving, over priced tacky keep safe hoarding (because you know the value of a Wills and Kate biscuit tin is sure to increase over time) and of course the screening of the Wedding of the year!”

King’s undergrad Juan Zober De Francisco told The Tab: “This is classic King’s: one wedding, three parties. The advantage is that whatever your view tomorrow should be a fun day!”

King’s College Lad’s Union also sent their regards to the Royal couple, telling The Tab:  “We think Wills is a good lad and is doing well for himself bagging such a fittie. Looking forward to the leaked videos from the honeymoon sesh.”

An estimated 2 billion people will watch tomorrows wedding between Prince William and Kate Middleton, but many Cantabs may have to give it a miss as lectures and supervisions will continue regardless.