If the cast of The Traitors series attended Bristol Uni, this is what they would be like

I’m not in Wills… BUT ROSS IS

3 months ago

BBC’s The Traitors has won the heart of the nation with Claudia Winkelman’s iconic fringe blessing our screens every Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday night. After a popular first season, the show returned this January with 22 new eager players, willing to do whatever it takes to win the prize fund.

The reality show is full of big personalities and backstabbing manipulators, sharing the key traits of a UoB student. So, here is what nine season two Traitors cast members would get up to if they attended UoB.

1. Jaz

Jaz studied criminology, explaining his fantastic detective skills on the show. Unite House was his first year residency, tame and unmemorable, like his presence at the round tables. He avoided Fishies like the plague, so he wouldn’t run into any quarter zip and chino wearers. Instead, Jaz enjoyed a pint in the W.G. Grace, observing traitorous behaviour at the bar and booths.

2. Paul

Paul’s degree is in business management with major CEO energy. You can bet Paul is involved in every society, with a particular interest in Pantosoc as he just loves playing a villain. As he is sooooo popular, he assumed he would roam the corridors of Hiatt Baker with every flatmate bowing down at his knees. However, he unfortunately ended up in UH, beginning his villain origin story.

3. Charlotte

Charlotte read English and loved EVERYONE in her seminars, describing them all as “bloody brilliant!” She chose Goldney Hall for the aesthetic, reading Pride and Prejudice on its grounds. Her student loan was mostly spent on pumpkin spice lattes at Source café, consumed in the SU living room.

4. Andrew

Andrew, of course, was an economics and finance student, bossing his way into becoming an insurance broker. All Stars Sports Bar was his second home whenever the Dragons were on. Andrew was a regular at fishies with the rugby boys, although he was very “elusive” in the smoking area. He was a Badock boy, building his resilient mentality as he had to deal with those dodgy bedrooms and bathrooms.

5. Harry

Harry was in Riverside and loved a bit of Pryzm, although he kept this extremely quiet for obvious reasons. As part of the engineering faculty, you could often find Harry and his dangly earrings around the Queens building. He was the reason many blondes at UoB developed major trust issues, love bombing them until he decided to rob a few gold rings from their bedside table. Witty and intelligent, but also sly and deceitful, was how he was described by his flatmates – forming the basis for him to become the ultimate traitor.

6. Ross

Ross is your typical ‘edgy’ Bristol boy, studying film and making it his entire personality. Yes, one of those who asks why you haven’t watched Pulp Fiction. He wanted to be in Hiatt but Diane called up the uni and forced him into Wills. Ross loved a bit of Crofters and Mr Wolfs, and occasionally a Thekla Thursday if he was feeling crazy. He had the ultimate rizz by giving girls a cheeky wink in the smoking area. Diane, as an alumni, often came to visit, taking him out for a roast instead of making a “mid” one as usual.

7. Diane

Diane was wild and free at UoB, sipping on fizzy Rosé at most Wills pres. As a geography student, Diane loved a field trip, taking control in any group setting. She was heavily involved in athletics, a true track star as shown in the challenges on the show. Diane made enemies due to her boldness and honesty, but she was also loved by many, as a caring individual, being the mother of the group. As a proud Bristol graduate, she forced her son Ross to attend.

8. Molly

Molly studied psychology, but this didn’t help her understand that one should never trust a brunette UoB boy. Molly enjoyed a pub night over clubbing, being a regular White Bear and Steam goer. She religiously studied at Bakesmiths to avoid certain traitorous men on campus. She was popular in her student accom of Manor Hall, was actively involved in fashion-forward soc and was a friendly face to see around Cotham Hill.

9. Zack

Zack was a bit of a nightmare at uni, speaking too honestly in Brass Pig’s smoking area every Monday. Zack was a uni celeb, seeing him on most night outs and whispering to your mate “that loudmouth is here.” As a Churchill boy, he quickly developed an ego and hardly acknowledged his politics degree. However, he learnt how to not always say what he thought and eventually became well-liked and sought-after mate.