‘Killer clowns’ arrive in Selly

This is it, this is the end

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Our beloved Selly Oak is the latest victim of the intimidating clown wave sweeping the UK and the US. Several people spotted a clown walking up Exeter road late last night.

Third Year Psychology student Maddie Roberts was one of the first to broadcast the awful news on the Fab ‘n’ Fresh Facebook group to warn other students of the situation.

She told the Tab: “It was so strange. My coursemates and I were walking back from the station tonight when this clown appears wandering down the middle of the road staring at us. We walked on trying to ignore him but he stopped, removed his mask and smirked at all the passers by before heading off to Heeley, just wandering down the road showing off amongst all the traffic.

Louis Fitzgibbon, another Brum student, said: “I might be mistaken. I don’t want to scare anyone unnecessarily but I saw what I believe was a clown lurking around in the distance.”

Exeter Road, where the clown was seen

We can only hope that these are just some clown enthusiasts trying to put on a show to feed their egos rather than actually do anyone harm. However, given Selly’s notorious blade wielding, balaclava wearing mugging spree we saw last year, it’s getting harder to keep our hopes up.

Try and stay safe – lock your doors, and try and steer clear of scary clowns bent on Selly’s destruction.