Which type of Lad is best for a Lads Holiday?

It’s coming up to that time of year again, lads are booking their holidays. Lets be honest, you only need one hand to name the destinations: AMSTERDAM, MAGALUF, IBIZA, ZANTE, PRAGUE.

Yes, all your mates are lads. But there are subcategories to the stereotypical lad – each type has specific characteristics which can either hinder or benefit the holiday. Who is the best to have on your trip abroad? This list will help you decide.

The ‘Dad Lad’

It’s 5am and you’re walking back to the hotel after the last night out. You start to think about the future… Do I need a girlfriend? Shoud I change course? The terrifying prospect of going back to normality has you on the boarderline of tears. Who is there to give you words of wisdom? ‘Dad Lad’. He is always there for you, he is the ‘heart to heart’ master. After a ‘Dad Lad’ convo you feel a lot better and get back to the banter. God Bless you ‘Dad Lad’.

The ‘Nutter Lad’

Mums look away now. This lad makes Charlie Sheen seem like the Pope. He sneaks all his gear through customs and opens up a bag full of sin in the hotel. On the first night the lads are a bit jet lagged, and just fancy a quick drink at the pub. Not ‘Nutter Lad’ – he’s straight on it with the Class A drugs. He convinces some of the other boys to try some, but the sensible lot decide they don’t want to be in a comma for the rest of the holiday. By the end of the week ‘Nutter Lad’ somehow hasn’t been arrested and leaves the country with an STI, a bruised eye, a deteriated liver, oh and of course a luggage full of vomit smelling clothes. A success in his eyes.

The ‘Brad Lad’

If you are not a privileged ‘Brad Lad’ then you will suffer with the majority. This good looking (Brad Pitt) Lad can walk up to any living specimen and get their number. He’s thick as sh*t but when it comes to a lad’s holiday, he ranks above the brainboxes with the art of flirting. He has lucious thick locks and a six pack (that he shows off every two seconds). This lad is a ‘loveable rouge’ who gets all the success away from home, but when he’s back he’s jobless, still living with mum and dad and spends the majority of his days doing his hair.

Sun’s out guns out

The ‘Cautious Lad’

“Right has everyone got their passports? What about suncream?” This oxymoronic named ‘Cautious Lad’ is always prepared for an emergency. He has a first aid kit, an always fully charged phone, and of cause an eagle eye that spots immediate danger. Probably a good idea to have ‘Cautious Lad’ and ‘Nutter Lad’ in the same hotel room.

I’ve forgotten something haven’t I?

‘Miss Lad’

This Lad or Ladette, if you will, brings her own sense of ladness to the group. Being the only girl she even outranks ‘Cautious Lad’ in organisation. However, when it is time to go out she is a nutter and surprises the whole group with her incredible ability to down pints. This lad is underestimated in her Ladiness – she outdrinks Nutter Lad and the boys can’t stop high fiving her. Top notch.

The ‘Dumb Lad’

He thinks he knows the local phrases – but he doesn’t. He thinks his jokes make sense – but they don’t. He thinks he can flirt with anyone – but he can’t. He thinks he knows what can go through Airport security – oh sh*t. Yup the one, the only – ‘Dumb Lad’. Get ready to gain another wrinkle on your forehead. This guy will attempt to speak to the local girls on a nightout in their language – and probably swear at them without knowing. He’d pretend to know where the club is and end up in a neighbouring city. Oh and of course this kid will have his mobile data on all holiday – “Oh don’t worry Ibiza is in the EU, that gives my data a special deal” Course it does ‘Dumb Lad’, course it does.

What you doing mate

The ‘Chill Lad’

This isn’t the best lad to have organising transport or keeping hold of the passports. But if an emergency does occur, ‘Chill Lad’ calms everyone down and will crack a joke to make you see the funny side. He is so relaxed that he doesn’t worry about, well anything. He’ll stop the odd fight (group or randomers) and lets be honest the group love him because how can you not.

#ladsontour

The ‘Unknown Lad’

The next lad is perfectly depicted by ‘Richard’ from the Inbetweeners Movie (Google him). This lad has a distinct difference from the others – he ain’t part of the group. ‘Unkown Lad’ will find you on the first day and he won’t leave you. Your politeness slowly fades throughout the week – and by the last day you get a bit tipsy and end up screaming “P*SS OFF RICHARD, I MET YOU 4 DAYS AGO, I DON’T WANNA HEAR ABOUT YOUR DOGS FAVOURITE FOOD, OR HOW YOU HAVE BEEN TO EVERY COFFEE SHOP IN AMSTERDAM. HOW THE FU*K DO YOU EVEN KEEP FINDING US?”. At this point you should go see ‘Dad Lad’. Sorry Richard.